This is Them

A Walk to Remember

Director: Adam Shankman

Cast: Mandy Moore, Shane West, Peter Coyote, Daryl Hannah

Released: January 25, 2002

Disclaimer: I apologize for how this review looks; I know it looks like a hot mess. 

SPOILERS AHOY! MAJOR SPOILERS AHOY IF YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THIS MOVIE! YOU HAVE  BEEN WARNED! 

Oh, Nicholas Sparks. He has a way of creating a love story between two unlikely people that you're rooting for, then at the very end, putting the knife in you side and twisting it. I've never actually read any of his books and I've only seen two movies his books are based on: this one and The Notebook. I would say these two (especially The Notebook!) are the most popular. I heard the book version of A Walk to Remember takes place in the '50s. I'm very glad they updated it to "modern" times for the movie. Also, interestingly enough, The Notebook was published three years before A Walk to Remember was, but as a film, The Notebook came out two years after the release of A Walk to Remember. Did that make any sense? Wait, should book titles and movie titles both be italicized? Now I'm confusing myself! 

When I first saw this way back when, I had no idea what the "walk" they were referencing in the title meant, but after seeing the movie, I was like, oh, yeah, duh, I should have gotten that. This movie is as hokey as it gets and I know it's emotionally manipulating, but it got me, I won't lie. The main premise of the movie is that the "bad boy" falls in love with the "good girl", you know, that old cliche! They are both high school seniors and live in the small town of Beaufort, North Carolina. 

When we first meet Landon (Shane West), our bad boy in question, he is part of the cool and popular kids at school and he and his friends have skipped out on a school dance (where they have been drinking beer) to go to some abandoned factory near a lake. They are waiting on a kid named Clay because they have told him if he does some sort of initiation, he will be able to be part of their group. Now you would think Clay would be some kind of stereotype of the type of kid high school bullies like to make fun of: the fat kid or the geeky scrawny kid with glasses, but Clay appears to look fairly normal. He seems like he's perfectly capable of making his own friends and not hanging out with this group of cretins. Also, if you need to do something dangerous (or anything, really, but especially if it's something dangerous) to prove your worthiness to be friends with someone, maybe you shouldn't be friends with them in the first place. Just saying. They want Clay to climb some scaffolding, then jump into the lake below him. The whole time they are all giggling, which is another sign that Clay shouldn't have done this. They obviously want him to make a fool out of himself. It looks to be about a three story jump and looks to be very dangerous if they don't know how deep the lake is. He does ask them, but they tell him they don't know, but that it's perfectly safe. Landon even climbs up there with him and tells him he's going to jump with him, but of course he doesn't, he just pretends like he's going to jump. We do find out later that Landon did this jump before and while he didn't seriously injure himself, he did admit it hurt like hell. I guess that's what he was thinking that would happen to Clay. I honestly couldn't remember what the end results were, but I knew they weren't going to kill him off because they do want the audience to like Landon by the end of the movie and I knew if he had involuntarily killed another kid, that probably wouldn't be a good look on him! After he jumps, he doesn't resurface for the longest time, so they do make you think that something might have happened to him and even the other kids are quite concerned. He does resurface, but he appears to be hurt and/or unconscious. Landon manages to pull him out of the lake, but has to run because the police has caught up with them and ends up crashing his car and needs to walk around with crutches for awhile. Clay ends up in the hospital, but I'm not exactly sure what happened to him, like, was he paralyzed or did he break a bone? 

The following Sunday, his mother (played by Daryl Hannah) makes him attend church where Reverend

And now I'm ready to
be extrodianary.

Sullivan (played by Peter Coyote) talks about what happened the other night and how Clay's life was saved by the lord. He tells the parish, "Let us pray for the lives of the others involved who are clearly not on the path of righteousness" while giving the stinkeye to Landon. This pastor does not like Landon one bit. His daughter, Jamie (played by Mandy Moore), sings in the church and even has her own solo, because, of course she does. She's the pastor's daughter, after all! We get our first little hint that Landon finds her attractive when she starts singing in her angelic voice. Landon's ex-girlfriend, Belinda, who hangs in the same cool kid group and wants to get back together with him, notices Landon noticing Jamie. The movie does its best to make Mandy Moore look pretty frumpy, but you can still tell she's a pretty girl. She's supposed to be this religious bookworm who doesn't have any friends because everyone makes fun of her for wearing dumpy pea-colored cardigans and long skirts and matronly dresses. One thing they do to make her look less pretty is give her these awful bangs. I don't know what is going on with them, but even Mandy Moore can barely pull them off. I mean, they're so bad that she has her bangs pulled back in a barrette in the movie poster!  She's not totally socially incapable, though. When one of Landon's cool kid friends (and the biggest douche of the group), Dean, asks her, "If there's a higher power, why can't he get you a new sweater?", she retorts, "He's too busy looking for your brain." Ooh, burn! 

The next Monday, Landon reports to the principal's office where he informs Landon that students saw him drinking Saturday night, the night of the dance, on school property. That seems to be the main thing he's getting in trouble for as Clay isn't talking about what happened (interesting; why is he protecting those a*holes or is he just worried what will happen if he does squeal?) and the factory owner isn't pressing charges for trespassing. Not sure what kind of factory they were trespassing in. Landon doesn't get expelled, but he does get a hefty punishment: he will help the janitorial staff after school (he even makes a remark about wanting to get paid for it; shut up, dude!), he will tutor "disadvantaged students" at their sister school on Saturday mornings, and will participate in the drama club's spring play. Now, if I were a theater student, I would be a little offended that that would be considered as a punishment, but they will also have more to be offended about concerning all of this. 

Of course Jamie also tutors on Saturday mornings, but not because she's in trouble, because if you haven't

Walk me home;
I don't wanna go
all the way alone.

realized by now, she never gets in trouble. Not that I'm judging her because I was a goody goody in school too even though I got detention once because I was one minute (if that!) late to class after lunch. Don't you think that's a bit extreme? I sure do. No, Jamie does it out of the goodness of her heart, because she wants to. She really does not care what people think about her because on the bus ride home, she goes over to sit next to Landon, who is listening to his headphones, and asks him if he wants to buy raffle tickets to raise money to buy new computers. He ignores her and she tries to give him tips on tutoring, but he is still ignoring her. She then proceeds to ask him if he's visited Clay in the hospital and when she is still ignored by him, she says to herself, "That would be a no." She then tells him that Clay has been moved from the hospital to the rehab place. Again, I have no idea what happened to Clay after he jumped off that scaffolding. Landon tells her that her social skills need some work and you know what? I kinda agree with him. She really needs to know how to read a room, or in this case, bus. Also, what is the point of talking to someone if they don't want to talk to you? Since he is already talking to her, he continues by telling her that nobody forced him to jump and she tells him, "It's called peer pressure." He asks her if she knows about that from her "precious book" and we see a shot of her holding her bible in her lap. I guess this is in case we may have forgotten that Jamie takes God and religion very seriously. This is also where we learn that Jamie and Landon have known each other since kindergarten and this is probably the first time they've ever talked to each other. 

We see Landon at his next form of "punishment" when his friend Eric drops him off for play practice and he reminds him when it will be over so he can pick him up later. We get this bizarre comment from Eric where he says that they should do West Side Story so they can get that "nice, big booty-lookin' girl from Selena". Two things: first of all, why would Jennifer Lopez be in some random small town North Carolina high school musical? Huh? That doesn't even make sense. Also, wouldn't Jennifer Lopez already be a household name by now? Why is he referring to her as the "girl from Selena?" To be honest, I'm not really sure when this movie is supposed to take place. I assumed it was 2001 since the movie came out in early 20002, but I'm pretty sure people would've known her by then. We at least know it's after Selena came out, which was early 1997. Maybe I don't remember and J-Lo WASN'T super famous by then. (She definitely wasn't referred to as J-Lo yet, I'm pretty sure of that). After I looked up Adam Shankman's (the director) filmography, it makes sense that this is in here because he directed The Wedding Planner with Jennifer Lopez, which came out a year before this movie. So I guess that was a shoutout to her. 

The school spring musical being put on isn't already an established play. Rather, it's an original piece of work written by a student called "Thornton's Way" and Jamie wrote the lyrics and music for all the songs which is quite ambitious of her. It "follows the rise and fall of Tommy "The Gun" Thornton in prohibition era New York" and is described as "a story of burning passions and blazing Tommy guns." I guess its supposed to be some early twentieth century gangster play. Everyone sits around in a circle and does a read through of the play, including Landon and he is absolutely terrible. The drama teacher even asks him, "Are you trying to be bad at this?" and he replies, "No, it just comes naturally." So how the hell he got cast as the lead, I'm not quite sure. I guess this was part of his punishment? Again, if I were one of the drama kids and wanted this role, I would have been majorly pissed! I guess we got that scene of him reminding Eric what time to pick him up to show us that Eric did NOT show back up to pick him up, so Landon asks Jamie if she can give him a ride home, which she does. 

As they drive, she turns on the radio, and I swear to God, she's listening to herself. The singer sounds exactly like Mandy Moore...but it wasn't a song I recognized. The only songs I knew from this movie were "Cry", "Only Hope", and "Dare You to Move". I did look up the soundtrack list and Mandy Moore is listed as having a few other songs that I'm not familiar with, so maybe one of them was during this scene? But why is she listening to herself? Is that supposed to BE Mandy Moore? I don't think it's supposed to be Jamie - I'm pretty sure she would be much more popular than she is if people knew she was a recording artist! I don't know, it was really weird. Maybe it's not even Mandy Moore, but it just sounds like her. This is when we learn about Jamie's "To Do" list, which, is really her Bucket List. Things included on this list include spend a year in the peace corps, make a medical discovery, befriend someone she doesn't like (I think she sees the perfect opportunity for that in Landon), be in two places at once, and get a tattoo. I'm not sure how many items she has, but each one is listed and the lower the number, the more important the item. When Landon asks her what her number one is, she replies, "I'd tell you then I'd have to kill you" and I'm thinking, Wow, she must want to do something really illegal or something. But no, it's just personal. We'll find out about it later. Hint: it has something to do with the title of the movie. When they drive pass a bunch of his friends at a hangout, Landon slouches down in the street so they can't see him. What a tool. 

There's three weeks until the musical and Landon is worried about memorizing his lines. He tries reading his lines with Eric, who tells him, "De Niro couldn't even make this work." Huh? I'm pretty sure this, a musical about mobsters, is up De Niro's alley. Okay, maybe not the musical part, but I would think the mobster part he would be quite familiar with. Of course maybe he's just saying how terrible the dialogue is. When Landon realizes that Eric or any of his other friends aren't going to be any help in the line reading department, he asks Jamies to help him with his lines. I should point out that Jamie is playing Alicia, the "mysterious club singer." So, yes, Landon and Jamie got the two leads in the musical. Contrived, much? Nah, I didn't think so either. Jamies tells him she will, on one condition. With a straight face, I swear to God, there's not even a crack of the smile to indicate she's joking, she tells him, "You have to promise you won't fall in love with me." Okay. Wow. This girl sure has a lot of unwarranted confidence. Look, I get why this line is in the movie...it will come back later. However, this is a TERRIBLE place to have her say it. Maybe have her say it when he DOES start having feelings for her and wants to date her. This just makes her look really...socially inept. Does she really think this boy is going to fall in love with her (at this moment?) Landon just kind of smirks at her and says, laughing, "That's not a problem." Which, honestly, would have been my reaction too. If somebody ever said that to me, I think my eyes would get stuck at the top of my head from rolling them so hard. Also, I would never say something so cheesy to anyone unless it was an obvious joke (and I would only say something like that if it were an obvious joke!)

That night, Landon is driving along and stops when he sees Jamie sneaking into a graveyard with a

I saw the crescent;
you saw the whole
of the moon.

telescope. For some reason, he feels the need to follow her and asks her what she's doing. She show him and tells him she wants to build a bigger telescope to view the comet, Hyakutake (yes, I looked it up, and yes, it is a real comet). Supposedly it's to make a reappearance that spring. They have a little bit of a heart to heart and Landon tells her, "There's too much shit in this world", to which she responds, "Without suffering there'd be no compassion." Jamie has agreed to help Landon with his lines after he asks her and they run lines together.

They seem to have bonded, at least Jamie thinks so, so the next day at school when she sees Landon talking with his friends, she says hello to him and says, "I'll see you after school?" since they've made plans to go through their lines together. He totally snubs her and replies, "In your dreams" and his friends laugh like it's the funniest thing ever. This totally reminds me of that episode of The Wonder Years when Kevin has to be partners with this weird girl named Margaret Farquhar who he doesn't like, but once he gets to know her, he thinks she's pretty interesting, but he still can't get himself to hang out with her in public, so he tells her they can be "secret friends". Needless to say, that doesn't go over too well! Just like in this movie when Landon shows up at Jamie's after school and she shuts the door in his face. When she opens the door again, Landon tells her he wants to run lines together and she says, "Okay, but just not so anybody knows, right?" Landon figures they could surprise everyone with how good he gets. Jamie sarcastically says, "Like we could be secret friends?" and Landon, totally unable to read her, says, "Exactly! It's like you're reading my mind." She tells him, "Maybe you can read mine" and glares at him, then tells him she thought she saw something good in him, but was "very wrong". So yeah, you can probably see why that reminded me of that episode of The Wonder Years. 

We next get a montage of the next couple weeks of Landon learning his lines (by himself) and rehearsing (by himself). But just so it's not scenes of that, also thrown into the montage is him looking through the yearbook and seeing that Jamie's ambition is "to witness a miracle" and a slow motion scene of them in the hallway eyeing each other as they pass each other and it is everything. 

The first night of the play, everyone important to the movie has come to see it, including Landon's dad who he doesn't talk to. Eric is sleeping in the audience, which I don't blame him because the play looks pretty boring...until we get to the big musical number where Jamie sings "Only Hope". If I were in the audience, I would wonder why she wasn't a recording artist or writing songs for musicians because I would be thoroughly impressed that a seventeen-year-old wrote that song! Actually, Switchfoot wrote that song. I had no idea. And apparently it came out in 1999, but I had never heard it until I saw this movie. They do play the Switchfoot song later in the movie, but I like the Mandy Moore version better. She slays the song.

Before Jamie's character, Alicia, sings her big number, she's wearing a hooded cloak and she takes it off to reveal a blue dress that's showing a little more skin than what we're used to seeing Jamie wearing and her hair is done up in curls and she's gotten rid of those godforsaken bangs. Apparently they never had a dress rehearsal and this is the first time they've run the play on a stage with costumes because Landon is gobsmacked that - GASP!- Jamie is really, really pretty! Look, I understand they want this to be his first reaction to seeing her all dolled up, but in what world do you put on a play for the first time for an audience without doing a dress rehearsal? And then she sings and everybody is dead because she KILLS it. (Oops, probably shouldn't be making "dead" and "kill" jokes with this movie!) Landon tells her, "All I know is you're beautiful" and leans over and kisses her, which was not written in the script. We see reactions shots of Jamie's dad and Landon's ex, Belinda, and neither of them are very happy. 

Now that Landon finds Jamie attractive, he wants to be with her and the nexts day at lunch he sits with her, not caring who sees them together and tells her that she "inspires" him. Now THIS would be the time for Jamie to tell him not to fall in love with her. Instead she tells him, "You don't know the first thing about being someones's friend" and he tells her, "I don't want to just be your friend" and when Jamie tells him, "You don't know what you want", he replies, "Neither do you, you're too scared somebody might actually want to be with you", which, I'm confused why he thinks this because he doesn't know her big secret yet. Yes, if he knew, I could understand that. He tells her it scares her because she wouldn't be able to hide behind her books or telescope of her faith and the real reason why she is scared is because she wants to be with him, too. A little presumptuous of us, hmm? 

We know Landon is serious about Jamie because we get a scene of Eric telling Landon that it seems he doesn't have time for his "real" friends anymore and Landon tells him he's "sick and tired of doing the same shit all the time", to which Eric replies, "This girl has changed you and you don't even know it." Oh, I think he realizes it. He pretty much admits he's outgrown his old friends. 

I got a crush on you; I
hope you feel the
way that I do. I get a 
rush when I'm with you.

Jamie warms up to Landon after he gives her a pink cardigan (so I guess it was the color and not they type of sweater they were making fun of) and sticks up for her after a prank Belinda and her mean girl friends play on her. Belinda invites Jamie to have lunch with her after she tells her she'd "be so beautiful if she knew how to do her make up". Jamie doesn't seem too insulted by this, even though I think she she should be, and agrees, thinking Belinda is going to give her beauty tips or something. Belinda also tells Jamie that there's no hard feelings because she and Landon are over and Jamie tells her, "I really don't know what you're talking about" which I'm sure pisses Belinda off. Anyway, Belinda makes this whole show of inviting Jamie to eat lunch with her just so they can both walk in the cafeteria together and Belinda can show Jamie the worst photo-shopped photo in the history of the world. A picture of Jamie's face - just her face, not her head - has been pasted on the body of a busty model wearing underwear. This thing is so obviously fake that I don't know why Jamie is so upset. I understand why she's humiliated, but this thing looks like a five-year-old made it and all the kids are laughing like it's the most hilarious thing they've ever seen. What a bunch of immature dweebs. Instead of spewing a witty comeback about how shoddy their photo-shop skills are, Jamie instead turns and prepares to flee the scene, crying, but runs into Landon who tells her, "This is about me, not you." He gets into a physical altercation with Dean after Dean makes some crude comments about Jamie and Dean tells him that they're through. Even though school is still in session, Landon and Jamie leave and Landon asks her out, but she tells him she's not allowed to date. So Landon gets permission from her dad which is kinda cute and they are able to go out to some restaurant on the water and Jamie is wearing the pink cardigan Landon gave her. They are both the youngest people there by at least forty years. Landon asks her what her number one on her list is, but she still won't tell him and he tells her his number one "to do" is getting out of Beaufort. The subject of her list is brought up because he has a surprise for her. He takes her to the state line and tells her to put one foot here and the other foot there and tells her she's in two places at once: North Carolina and Virginia. In another scene, we see him giving her a temporary tattoo of a butterfly since getting a tattoo was on her list. First of all, does a fake tattoo even count? Second of all, she doesn't seem the type to want to get a tattoo. Nonetheless, it is the most sensual scene in the movie cuz he's blowing on her shoulder to dry the tattoo. And once again, it sounds like they're listening to Mandy Moore on the car radio. 

I wanna be with you. 
If only for a night, to be the
one who's in your arms 
to hold you tight.

We get a cute scene of him telling her, "I might kiss you" and her replying "I might be bad at it" and he tells her that it's "not possible" and he drops the big bombshell that he loves her and she starts to freak out because she has a MAJOR secret that she hasn't shared with him yet and she's all, "I TOLD you not to fall in love with me!" Even though she doesn't tell Landon that she loves him (at that point, anyway), she does tell her father and he tells her to "be fair to him before things get worse." Hmm, whatever could he be talking about?

Jamie does tell Landon that she loves him the night they go star gazing and he tells her he had a star named after her (another item on her list). Since she has professed her love to him, he once again asks what her number one is and she tells him it's to get married in the same church where her parents were married. It's also the same church where her mother grew up and I assume it's the same church now where her dad is a minister? 

Being with Jamie has motivated Landon to write his own lists of things he wants to accomplish. He left it in the pocket of his pants and his mom found it when she was doing laundry. (Seriously, this senior in high school can't even do his own laundry?? Maybe his first item should be "Do my own damn laundry".) As Jamie, Landon has aimed high for his ambitions too: "examine a moon rock, go to college, get into medical school." Uh, when has Landon ever expressed interest in the medical field? That was a little baffling. He's embarrassed that his mom has found his list, but tells her that he can do it and that Jamie has faith in him and that "she makes me want to be different, better." It's actually very sweet. 

One evening they're walking around the small town of Beaufort (I say small because it seems like they're always running into Landon's old friends like they do that night). Jamie seems particularly upset about something one night and runs into an alley. Landon asks her if she's worried about college applications and she tells him she's not applying to college. He thinks she must be taking a year off since she did say the peace corps was on her to do list, but she tells him he just assumed she was going to college. She tells him she's sick and he thinks she's talking about she doesn't feel good at that moment and offers to take her home. I can't fault him; I probably would have had the same thought. But no, it's much worse than that. She tells him she has had leukemia and two years ago she "stopped responding to treatment." She doesn't give how much time she has, but considering she feels it's not even worth applying to school, it's probably not very long, probably less than a year (and she will die in less than a year). Of course Landon is shell shocked by this and I feel bad for the guy. Here he's found this girl who brings out the best in him and he's totally in love with her and has just found out she doesn't have long to live and she's only eighteen years old. I mean, damn movie, are you trying to make me cry? He asks her why he didn't tell her and she replies, "The doctor said I should go on and live life normally as best I could." She didn't want anybody to be weird around her, especially him. She tells him she was getting along fine with everything and had accepted it, "and then you happened. I do not need a reason to be angry with God." I probably feel even worse for Jamie. Not only is her life cut considerably short and she's pretty much waiting to die, but she's found someone who loves her for who she is and she loves him back and she won't be able to live her life with him. Damn, movie, like are you seriously trying to make me cry?? Because you're doing a really good job! 

In the middle of the night, Landon drives to his dad's house and knocks on the door until he answers. He asks him if he can help Jamie and his dad calmly tells him he's a cardiologist (this is the first time I'm learning that his dad is a doctor!) and doesn't know Jamie's case or history and would have to talk to her physicians. What he says totally makes sense and he didn't say he WOULDN'T help him, but Landon, who has a tempestuous relations with his dad, snaps, "Just forget it! I knew it!" and abruptly leaves. Dude, I know you're upset about your girlfriend, but maybe give you dad a chance to explain himself. 

So I'm not exactly sure when Jamie was diagnosed with leukemia, we just know that treatment stopped working two years ago. I find it hard to believe that she lives in this small town where she's pretty much known all the kids she goes to school with since kindergarten and nobody knows about this. It seems something as big as that would be hard to keep in a small town. But after she tells Landon, word gets out she has cancer and Landon's old friends suddenly start being nice to him again since now they know that Jamie is dying. He does make amends with all of them after they offer their condolences and apologizes. Dean offers to help him with the surprise telescope he's been building for Jamie to see the Hyakutake comet. Belinda gives Landon pictures of the play (I guess she's a photographer for the school newspaper?) and apologizes about the first-grade level photoshopped pics. 

The next time Landon talks to Jamie after she told him she was dying she asks him if she's scared and she replies, "To death", which he doesn't think is very funny. (I mean, it is a little bit). She tells him she's scared of not being with him and he tells her, "That will never happen".

I'm craving for you; 
I'm missing you like candy.

Jamie has a health scare and lands in the hospital. I must say for someone who is sick and is going to die in a few months, she looks absolutely glowing and healthy. I mean, they could have at least tried to make her look like she was on her deathbed! When Landon visits her (and he pretty much never leaves her side), Jamie gives him a journal that belonged to her mother that has quotes from her favorites books and famous people, and, being that it is a journal, her own thoughts. She tells him that maybe God has bigger plans for her than she had for herself and that he (Landon, not God) was sent to her to help her through all of this and she calls him her angel, awww. The thing that really got me was a few days later when she told Landon she was going home because his dad was paying for private home care and Landon goes to see his dad and hugs him and oh no, I think there's something in my eye right now...

Landon finishes his surprise telescope for her and they are both able to look at the comet and I'm sorry, but it is absolutely adorable how he's holding her hand throughout the whole thing and damn movie, why you gotta kill off 1/2 of this adorable couple? It just isn't fair! 

Okay, so you remember how Jamie told Landon her number one on her bucket list was to get married in the same church as her parents? Well, this is where the title comes in. The Walk to Remember...is a walk down the aisle! Bet you didn't see that coming!  (I didn't when I first saw this because I'm a moron). While looking through the telescope, Landon asks her to marry him and she says yes. Now I understand that he's doing this because he loves her and because this is the thing she wants more than anything, but this has to be a bit psychologically damaging to Landon. Not just because he's getting married at the ridiculously young age of eighteen (yeah, that is insanely young to get married), but because his wife will DIE in a few short months. You could say the Walk to Remember wasn't actually all that rememberable because the scene is very rushed. In fact after this scene, is when we get the wedding scene where the Switchfoot version of "Only Hope" is played. Jamie's dad is the officiant of the wedding. I don't know how I'd feel about my dad being the officiant of my wedding, but I guess if I were dying, it would be a nice touch. As he reads the "Love is patient and kind" vows, Jamie and Landon mouth "I love to you" to each other, and oops, got something else stuck in my eye! 

In a voiceover, Landon tells us they "had a perfect summer with more love than lots of people know in a

It was there that I 
realize that forever was
in your eyes, the
moment I saw you cry 

lifetime", then she died. The movie closes with an epilogue where it's four years later and Landon, who made it to med school (would love to know how...guess he was smarter (book smarter) than he let on) is visiting Jamie's dad to return the book that Jamie gave him. He tells him, "I'm sorry she never got her miracle", because, as you may remember, that was her yearbook's ambition. Jamie's dad tells him, "She did. It was you." Okay, I'm not going to lie: after the scene of him reading that in the yearbook is when we see him learning his lines and I thought he wanted the miracle she witnesses was to be him learning his lines by himself. I guess this is a little better. 

As he leaves, Landon tells us in voiceover about Jamie: "Her love is like the wind; I can't see it, but I can feel it" - a callback to when Jamie compared her faith being like the wind for that reason. Cue "Cry" playing over the credits. I remember when that song came out and I freakin' love that song. 

Yes, this is truly a manipulative, schlocky movie that would normally make the dark-hearted cynic in me roll my eyes, but the two leads make this movie work and it's one of the better Nicholas Sparks adaptations (although, to be fair I haven't see that many...probably because most of them don't look that good!) 

Beverly Hills; What a Thrill!

Troop Beverly Hills

Director: Jeff Kanew

Cast: Shelley Long, Craig T. Nelson, Betty Thomas, Mary Gross, Jenny Lewis, Carla Gugino, Kellie Martin

Released: March 24, 1989

How did I go this long without seeing this movie? I am shocked that I never saw it in my childhood; it seems like something I would have loved. But somehow I managed to never see this until now. Honestly, I thought I was going to hate this movie or think it was the stupidest thing ever, but I absolutely loved it. Of course, my standards for it weren't that high, so that may have helped its case! I listened to a podcast review where somebody compared Phyllis Nefler to Elle Woods and being that I love Legally Blonde, it makes sense that I would love this movie too. Both characters are seen as ditzy women who only care about shallow things, but in the end they turn out to be stronger and more independent than anyone realized. You could say that Phyllis Nefler walked so Elle Woods could run. This is a bit of an odd movie in that fact that the rich people - crazy, filthy rich people - are the underdogs and you're rooting for them. In what world are rich people ever the underdogs? 

Who is Phyllis Nefler? She is our main character (played by Shelley Long), a Beverly Hills housewife who is separated from her husband, Freddy (Craig T. Nelson), who is living in the pool house until the divorce is finalized. Phyllis's excessive shopping and failure to stick with anything she starts are just some of the reasons Freddy is ready to end their marriage. He's also disappointed because she had "potential" and "energy" and was "so creative". She retorts back and tells him she went shopping to furnish his house and build his perfect image to be his "perfect Beverly Hills wife." The Neflers live in a mansion with a pool and a room that has its own balance beam for their daughter and Phyllis has a walk-in closet so large that she gets lost in it filled with the latest fashions. There's even a landscape mural of a river and green fields painted on the wall behind her bed. They've managed to acquire all of this because Freddy has his own auto shop and is known as "Nefler the Muffler Man." He must have an  international chain of these shops because I don't know exactly how lucrative the muffler business is. 

The Neflers have a twelve-year-old daughter, Hannah (played by Jenny Lewis of future Rilo Kiley fame in her first role; she would be in the god awful The Wizard later the same year - there's even a scene where she's playing Nintendo with her dad, was that a little cross promotion?) Hannah is a Wilderness Girl who belongs to Troop Beverly Hills. Wilderness Girl = Girl Scout. I guess they didn't get the rights to use the Girl Scout name. This Beverly Hills troop has never earned any patches or sold any cookies and they can never get a troop leader to stick with them very long. Phyllis has decided to put in an application to be the new leader for her daughter's troop. When the other leaders in the region gather at the Southern California Headquarters for the Wilderness Girls of America, they vote to let Phyllis be the new leader because her application seems promising. It says her interest include "community affairs" and we see a scene of her gossiping with her friend, another mother of a girl who is the troop. She's being shown a slew of shoes and she point to two pairs of them and tells the salesman, "This one and this one....OUT. I'll take the rest." On her application, she writes that she prides herself on being "honest, resourceful, and thrifty" and we see a scene of her trying on a beaded dress that costs $5600. She manages to knock $600 off when she tells the salesgirls that a bead is missing. Her application says she loves animals and we see a scene of her admiring a bejeweled frog broach at Cartier. 

In total, there are eight members of Troop Beverly Hills. This is a significantly lower number than the number of girls in the other troops, but having only eight girls makes it much more easier to keep track of them. Not to mention it makes sense that this troop wouldn't be that big. Besides Hannah, we also have the following:

-Lily is the daughter of a dictator of a non-specified southeast Asian country. Phyllis refers to her parents as "Mr. and Mrs. Dictator". Not sure why they are in Beverly Hills. Either they are spending summer vacation there or he was exiled. Lily's mother was modeled after Imelda Marcos because she is asked by someone how many pairs of shoes she owns.

-Tessa is the daughter of a Steven Speilberg-esque director who is currently directing a movie with Robert Redford. Tessa is in therapy, because, of course she is. 

-Tiffany is the daughter of a plastic surgeon. She seems to be the one to know the most about money. She doesn't want to go to the first troop meeting Phyllis is holding, so she haggles with her dad. He tells her he'll give her ten bucks, then ups the price to $30 when she says it's not worth it. She asks for $50 and he says, "Forty and that's my final offer" and she replies, "I'll suffer through it" while pocketing the money.  Tiffany is played by Emily Schulman who is best known for playing the bratty neighbor girl on Small Wonder. You remember that show? With the robot girl?  

-Emily (yes, they had a character named Emily and an actress named Emily and the actress named Emily didn't play the girl named Emily...) is the daughter of an actor who is aging out of Hollywood and is having trouble finding work. They aren't doing too well financially which we'll see later. Emily tells him she needs to bring ten dollars for dues, but he says he forgot his wallet. Dude, really? Emily is played by Kellie Martin of Life Goes On and ER fame. 

-Jasmine and her parents are pulled over by a cop on their way to the Neflers. This, unfortunately, is because they're a black family driving a Rolls Royce (I think? I'm not good with cars, but this was a super swank car) in an affluent neighborhood. Despite Jasmine's parents being dressed to the nines, especially her mother, the cop stops them and is ready to write them a ticket for "speeding". Jasmine asks him, "Don't you know who this man is?", referring to her father, who is a famous boxer. "He's the best, he's the greatest, he's my dad - James "The Jackhammer" Shakar." The cop forgets about the ticket and wants an autograph, but Mr. Shakar refuses to sign it on the ticket. 

-Claire is the daughter of a divorce lawyer and a romance novelist named Vicki Spratz (played by Stephanie Beacham; personally I think her name is better suited for a romance novelist!) who drives a DeLorean and dictates notes for her next novel into a recorder. Claire often helps her with the raunchy dictation. She is a child actress who stars in a show called Winnie and the Winklemans. I'm guessing she's Winnie. Claire is played by fellow child actress, Ami Foster, who played Margaux (yes, that's how it's spelled...so high brow!) on Punky Brewster. The only person I remember from that show is the titular one. 

-Chica is the daughter of jet-setting parents who are either in Monte Carlo or Morocco half the time and even forget about their daughter on her birthday. When we first meet her, she is wearing an equestrian outfit. You know the little bee-yotch has her own thoroughbred. Chica is played by Carla Gugino who is probably the best known and most prolific of the young actresses. She was actually a good three-four years older than the other girls as she told the director she was 14 when she was really 16. You can tell she's older because she's a good foot taller than some of the girls! 

Phyllis, who has caviar for the girls at their first meeting, asks them why they aren't wearing their uniforms and they tell her they've never had a leader stick around long enough to take them shopping to which Phyllis replies, "I have a black belt in shopping!" and takes them to the place where the uniforms are purchased. Now I was a Girl Scout when I was in elementary school and I don't particularly remember wearing a uniform. I kind of remember we had a vest or a sash to put our badges on, but I don't ever recall wearing it. But that was a long time ago. When Phyllis sees the uniform she asks, "Do they only come in khaki?" She's absolutely mortified when she tries it on and when she looks in the mirror, she exclaims, "Oh my God! The color's wrong, the collar's wrong, and the material's a nightmare from hell. It's cut badly, it itches and it's not me." She takes the uniform to her tailor, a snooty French man named Henri, who disdainfully asks her, "My God, darling, what is that?" when he sees the uniform. Phyllis asks him what can he do with it and he retorts, "You mean besides burn it?" and uses a handkerchief to take the hanger it's on while making a face. This guy deserves an Oscar, bravo! Henri himself deserves whatever award they give to fashion designers. He creates these impressive, impeccable Wilderness Girls leader uniforms (yes, plural) for her to wear and she has different outfits for different occasions They are on point; they are *muah*, chef's kiss.

The antagonist in this movie is Velda Plendor (Betty Thomas) who is the leader of the Culver City troop who her daughter and her daughter's friend, played by a young, brunette Tori Spelling are members of. This troop wears red feathers in their caps and calls themselves the Red Feathers. This is obviously to help differeinate them from other troops since all the girls are wearing the same uniform.  Velda describes herself as a mother, a widow, and an ex-army nurse. There is a running joke where her own daughter and assistant refer to her as "Miss Plendor, sir" (she refuses to let her daughter refer to her as "Mom"). She runs the first meeting all the troop leaders are gathered at and tells them, "If any of you Betty Crockers out there think you're just going to teach toddlers how to bake cupcakes, then you can leave now." Cue two elderly women getting up to leave.

As Velda tells the other leaders, "When we're looking for new leaders, we're looking for no non-sense women", Phyllis walks in (in heels, no less) wearing one of her new creations, a uniform that has now been tailored to fit her compete with forest green piping and a cape with green silk lining and she's even carrying a cigarette stick. We'll see a reiteration of the cape in another scene, except it's lined with gold lame (pretend there's an accent mark over the e). Not surprisingly, Velda is pretty dismissive of Phyllis and when Phyllis suggests instead of selling cookies door-to-door (to save a little time and shoe leather), why don't they just have a telethon that can be hosted by "Johnny or Merv", she just rolls her eyes. After this, Velda will become obsessed with taking Phyllis down and humiliating her.

Troop Beverly Hill's first big event with Phyllis Nefler as their troop leader is an overnight camping trip. Even though it is summer (I assume, or maybe it's just nice weather since they're in Southern California), Phyllis wears a floor-length white fur coat over one of her newly tailored uniforms. Her daughter points out it's only an overnight trip: "I think we'll be back before winter." The girls are taken to the campsite (which is near the Hollywood sign) in limos and they have a service that puts their tents up for them. Around the campfire, Phyllis makes fondue al fresco for all of them and is about to show them how to make espresso, but then it starts pouring. All the girls run to the tents for shelter, but Phyllis, who is wearing her white fur coat is trying to salvage the fondue, but she ends up falling in the mud, face first (did I mention she's wearing a WHITE fur coat?). After singing a round of "Kumbaya, My Lord" (a song that is quite prevalent in this), Phyllis takes the girls to the Beverly Hills Hotel. Hmm, is Phyllis the one who invented glamping? Was glamping a thing yet in the '80s? Phyllis calls Velda who isn't home, so she leaves a hilarious message that "her recommendation for a campsite was totally unsuitable. There were no outlets and there were dirt and bugs and it rains there. We found a place that's much more us." Haha! I love how she's so indignant that there were bugs and dirt at a campsite! They manage to keep the spirit of being on a camping trip alive by telling scary stories around the fireplace. I had to laugh at the story Tiffany told with all the rich people updates. Instead of saying "It sounded like it was in the den....then it came from the attic" like any normal person, she tells the story as such: "It sounded like it was in the foyer....then it came from the maid's room." Phyllis tells them a "scary" story (the creepy music playing during it was a nice touch) about going to Cristophe's to get her hair done and instead of Cristophe, there was a stranger named Renaldo who styled her hair, but instead of giving her something sophisticated, she looks into the mirror and exclaims, "He permed me!" and all the girls scream in horror. However, I thought everybody had perms in the '80s? Or were the Beverly Hills crowd too posh for that? I can see them thinking perms are too gauche, because most perms (especially from the '80s) are especially that. 

Velda got Phyllis's message so she brings her assistant, Annie (Mary Gross), to the Beverly Hills Hotel to inform Phyllis that she's supposed to be camping. Looking around the large, comfy room, she asks, "This is what you call roughing it?" Phyllis's response is, "One bathroom for nine people? Yes!" I have to side with Phyllis here. Even one bathroom with three people would be pushing it for me. 

Well, hello, l'il Tori Spelling!

The next big event is the annual "Wilderness Craft Day" and for that the girls put on a fashion show where Claire models what looks to be "an ordinary, high-quality backpack", but when you "lift the back and pop the snap", different outfits on hangers are revealed. As Phyllis tells them, "Just because you're out in the woods, it's no excuse not to look your best." Now it's a clever idea and these backpacks will come back later to serve a purpose (though looking good in the woods is not the purpose!), but who cares about looking "your best" when you're in the woods? You should be dressed for the elements, not for fashion. Also, you're bound to get dirty, so what's the point of looking your best? But I digress. However, I still wouldn't have the look of disdain the other girls from the other troops (especially the Red Feathers) seem to have for them. Tori Spelling (I can't be bothered to look up her character's name, so we'll just call her Tori Spelling) asks, "Where are you from? Mars?" Her friend (and Velda's daughter), Cleo, tells her, "Worse. Beverly Hills" and Tori rolls her eyes. I see you Donna Martin, I see you. 

Velda decides to send her assistant, Annie, on an undercover mission to spy on Phyllis and her troop because she is "a threat to everything we stand for." (I think she's being a tad overdramatic here). She tells Annie, "You can infiltrate her organization, win her trust" and "We are going to form a dossier of information on her." This includes Velda cutting out the insides of a book that has a hole carved in the middle and fitting a camera in the book. She also duct tapes a tape recorder (gotta love the '80s!) under Annie's shirt and places a mic in her scarf and covers it with a broach. We will see Annie taking photos not so subtly as the camera makes loud noises everytime she snaps a photo. Probably the line that made me laugh the most is when Annie calls Phyllis to offer her help as an assistant troop leader (while Velda is listening in, of course). Phyllis is pruning an orange tree (honestly, kind of surprised she was doing yard work) and tells her, "I really would love your help. The parents in this neighborhood are so self involved - oh, sh*t, I broke a nail." Oh my God, I died! That got a big laugh from me. 

At the first meeting Annie attends, the girls talk about how much they suck and how much better the Red Feathers are. Phyllis tells them she's going to show them "how to survive the wilds of Beverly Hills". We see the girls go to the aforementioned Cristophe's (luckily Renaldo wasn't there) and get manicures and pedicures. In this world, Wilderness Girls get "achievement patches" which are the equivalent to the badges that Girl Scouts obtain. We get a montage of them earning their badges, some are legit badges (like when they volunteer at an assisted living residence), but others are ones that Phyllis made up. One of those is the Jewelry Appraisal patch. Phyllis and the girls are gathered around a jewelry case at Cartier's as Tiffany is inspecting a diamond that she correctly appraises at $85,000. Two quick things: I'm impressed a twelve-year-old has an eye for this kind of thing and I'm surprised they let a twelve-year-old touch an $85,000 diamond. The jeweler tells them it's called a canary diamond. Phyllis asks him does it sing and when he says no, she presses the jewel against her ear and says, "Yes, it does" and she and the girls start singing "Kumbaya" once again. 

Phyllis holds a ceremony at the marina for the girls to receive their patches. Her uniform is sailor themed and I am here for it. She praises the girls for receiving 36 patches in three weeks and presents each one with the unique patches they earned. For instance, Tiffany earned the Friendship patch, the Shopping patch, and the aforementioned Jewelry Appraisal patch. Lily is presented with the International Affairs patch for teaching them "how to launder money and crash revolution". (You might remember her as the dictator's daughter). Phyllis jokingly gives Hannah the Best Daughter patch, but she has "legitimately" earned the Sushi Appreciation patch, the Fire Prevention patch (that one actually sounds like a real one), and the Gardening with Glamor patch. However, in the end, Velda will make them forfeit the patches since they aren't legit. 

We get an idea of just how destitute Emily's family is when Phyllis informs the girls before the ceremony that they will have to bring 7.50 for the patches. That's seven dollars and fifty cents; not seven hundred and fifty dollars (which would be a bit ridiculous!) Emily gets very upset because she is unable to afford this. Girl, why is you dad driving a fancy-ass car if he can't afford to give you a measly seven dollars and fifty cents?? Luckily, Tiffany, the girl obsessed with money, lends her ten dollars, but not before making a joke about interest. 

Phyllis takes the girl to court for a divorce hearing; they are there "to attest the division of property." She tells the judge, "The workings of the wonderful American judiciary system are something that every child should witness, especially with a woman like you in charge" for the reason why she brought her Wilderness Girls troop. She sure knows how to butter somebody up, which she is doing since she is late. Her excuse? "My troop and I were busy describing the fall fashion to the blind. One man said he could actually feel the colors." I'm guessing these were people who went blind later in life? There's a funny moment where both Hannah and Claire say hello to their fathers since Claire's dad is Mr. Nefler's lawyer. Phyllis finds out that Freddy wants to speed the process along because he is thinking of remarrying; he's been seeing his realtor. 

Annie shows Velda all the photos she's been surreptitiously (except not so much) taking and I noticed there was one shot which is at the wrong angle. We see a photo of the girls when they were at Cartier, but the photo is shown from where the camera (the movie camera, that is) would have been; where Annie was standing, her photo would have been at a different angle. I'm just saying. Even though Velda thinks she has a lot of incriminating evidence, the head of the Wilderness Girls organization isn't fazed by them, so Velda gets the idea for Annie to move in with Phyllis so they can really spy on her. I mean, she is becoming borderline obsessed with Phyllis. When Annie tells Phyllis that her apartment is being fumigated and she won't be able to live there for a couple of weeks, Phyllis is more than happy to let her stay with her (she does have plenty of room, after all!) 

It's cookie time! At a rally all the Wilderness Girls of SoCal attends, Velda informs them the troops who sell more than 1000 boxes of cookies will be able to attend the annual Jamboree. Whichever troop wins the Jamboree will be the poster troop for the following year. I love when Phyllis is excited about this, but then asks what a jamboree is. From what I gather, each troop gives the number of boxes they plan to sell and have to reach that goal. I didn't quite get this because the Beverly Hills troop decides to sell 2000 boxes. But what's the point of selling 2000 when you only need to sell 1000 to attend the Jamboree? And what happens if they don't sell 2000, but do sell at least 1000? Do they not get to attend because they didn't reach their goal? But then why have goals if all they need is to sell 1000? Am I making too much of this? Probably, since in the end it doesn't really matter. 

The Red Feathers do our girls dirty when they sell cookies in their ritzy Beverly Hills neighborhood, including to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. It's at that moment when Annie throws away the secret camera and dossier on Annie and is now firmly on Team Nefler. 

Instead of just having the parents buy all the boxes of cookies (well, except for Emily's dad since he can't even afford anything that's ten dollars), Phyllis wants the girls to do something that will "enhance community spirit." This leads us to a fantabulous montage of them selling cookies, which includes putting on a concert and singing an original song called "Cookie Time". Seriously, how was this movie not nominated for Best Original Song? Or best Costume Design for that matter? Inquiring minds want to know! Highlights of this montage include:
-The song! It is a bop and a half. 

-Jasmine wearing a Tina Turner wig.

-Money-obsessed Tiffany getting the line, "Cheap at even twice the price" because of course she would.

-When the girls are shilling out cookies at Spago and someone asks if they take American Express and Jasmine says, "We prefer Visa." 

-Vicki Sprantz signing her new book, "Malibu Bitch" (sounds like the essential beach read) while her TV actress daughter signs boxes of cookies a few feet away from her.

Phyllis calls Velda to tell her, "We didn't sell 2000 boxes of cookies" and you see Velda smiling
smugly, but it quickly vanishes when Phyllis tells her that they sold 4,732 boxes. She invites her to a gala that Chica's parents (I think it was her parents) are throwing for them when their check is presented. At the party, Velda finds out that Annie has gone to the dark side (or has she left the dark side?) Annie is wearing a dress that Hannah found for her in her mom's closet. I was kind of surprised that Phyllis had this dress because it was just ugly and seemed quite plain next to her more outrageous outfits. It looked like Annie was wearing a black trash bag with a pink tutu and two pink ribbons wrapped around her bodice. I didn't buy this dress coming from Phyllis's closest, it was kind of on the trashy (no pun intended) side. I also didn't really care for the dress Phyllis herself wore. It looked like a dyed egg painted for Easter exploded on her! 

We learn that Tessa's dad (the director) has cast Emily's dad (the out of work actor) in his new film that seems to be The Godfather. Now, does The Godfather not exist in this world and her dad is going to be the next Marlon Brando or is this a rendition of The Godfather? Also at the gala is Freddy who is impressed with Phyllis and showers her with compliments.  He tells her that she looks great, that she's turned around completely, that he's proud of her. He tells her he has "something very important" to talk to her about and she think he wants to get back together since he said he broke up with his girlfriend, but he wanted to discuss the custody arrangement of Hannah. 

The Jamboree is coming up  and Velda tells Phyllis that she's not fit to lead the girls, that "somebody's going to get hurt and it's going to be all your fault." Oh, somebody will get hurt on the Jamboree, but it won't be Phyllis's fault. When Phyllis gathers the girls for a meeting and tells them she's not qualified to take them on the Jamboree, they tell her that she can't quit, that they've come this far and she's done so much for them. One of the girls tells her, "You're our role model and our friend." Tessa, the nerdiest of the group (and the one who goes to therapy), tells her, "You took a group of overindulged, unmotivated alienated preadolescents and gave us a renewed sense of self esteem." Even Freddy, who overhears them, tells her that she's come too far to quit now. 

With all that motivation and support behind her, Phyllis, Annie, and the eight Wilderness Girls drive to the 60th Annual Wilderness Jamboree where Velda is a little dismayed (and annoyed) to see them. They drive up in two cars with the words "You gotta believe" and "We [heart] Beverly Hills" painted on the sides of each one. The main (and only, it seems) event is the survival competition where each troop will follow a path that is designated by their flag. Each troop has a different colored flag, blue for Beverly Hills. (Surprised it wasn't cerulean!) There are only four troops; we really aren't supposed to care about any of them except our girls and the Red Feathers. Since only Wilderness Girls and their troops leaders are allowed to compete, Velda does them dirty by firing Annie for really no good reason so Annie, the most experienced one on their troop, won't be able to accompany them. I didn't realize Velda had the power to do this since she's not the head of the entire Wilderness Girl organization (even though she acts like it). Obviously they do this because it would be too easy if they had Annie on their team and they need to have a little conflict for them. Even though Velda is the troop leader for the Red Feathers, she does not compete in the Jamboree since she created the course and knows everything about it. Instead, one of her assistant troop leaders will lead her troop.

When trying to figure out which direction they need to go, Phyllis says, "Gucci is north of Wilshire. The Beverly Wilshire Hotel is west. I think the campsite is at Cartier, so to speak." Feeling confident that they figured out their first task, they continue on. We see one of the little brats from the Red Feathers turn a blue arrow meant for Troop BH so they will go in the wrong direction and it leads them to Dead Man's Swamp where they run screaming after seeing a water moccasin. This leads them back on the trail where they encounter a skunk and they seem to be even more scared of it than the snake (look, I wouldn't want to encounter a skunk either, but I'd rather smell bad than be dead!) and hightail it down the path which leads them to the finish line mere seconds before the Red Feathers reach it. The Beverly Hills girls completed the course in 6 hours and 28.5 seconds and the Red Feathers completed it in 6 hours and 29 minutes. As you can imagine, Velda is livid. She blames the skunk since that's the reason the girls were running so fast. The skunk must have chased them because it also crosses the finish line and Velda picks it up (she's brave!) and tells it, "You're going to pay for this!" Pay, it did. The next scene we see is Velda at a campfire wearing a fur skunk cap, and roasting meat in the fire, presumably the skunk.

Since Velda already isn't playing fair, she tells her assistant leader that she (Velda) will be talking over tomorrow because the assistant will have to go home because she will be too sick to continue. For some reason, when she makes this announcement the next day, nobody disputes her. Oh, sure, there are cries of unfairness from the BH troop, but there's really nothing anybody can do about it. We get a little chant from our girls:  "We're the girls from Beverly Hills....Shopping is our greatest skill" complete with these super dorky dance moves. They're doing this as a marching song, but when they stop and do those dance moves it doesn't make sense because it slows them down, it doesn't keep them moving. I will say the "Beverly Hills, what a thrill!" chants are very catchy. 

They come to a rope bridge that has been cut by Velda in order to sabotage them. Phyllis pouts, "It really frosts my cookies that we have worked so hard and we have come so far, and now we have to stop." Hannah points to a large log that is covering the (ridiculously deep) ravine and wants to walk across it. Now as you may remember, the Neflers have a balance beam in their house that Hannah practices on, so we have come full circle. Phyllis tells her it's too dangerous and that "Only an idiot would walk across that... I'm going to do it." 

I'm not gonna lie; this scene made me anxious. It made me jump a few times, especially when it looked like she was going to fall. I knew this wasn't the type of movie where a beloved troop leader was going to fall to her death, but it still made me nervous! For example, when she's reached the middle of the log, she turns her head back towards the girls to tell them, "This isn't so bad", then almost loses her balance and everyone, including me, gasps loudly. A few steps later, Phyllis trips and fall on the log, scaring the girls (and me), but manages to stay on. It appears she's really close to the other side and she could easily scooch herself to solid land. Which begs the question, why didn't she just sit on her butt and move across that way instead of walking? If I had to cross something that high, that's what I would do. Hannah decides she's going to help her mom and also starts to walk across. I understand she's practiced on her balance beam, but there's a huge difference when you're a few feet away from a floor that is covered by a gym mat and when you're 100 feet (I could be a little hyperbolic there, but it did appear very deep!) above your impending death. Hannah gets her foot stuck in a groove and Phyllis gets up and turns around and goes to help her daughter. So basically Hannah went across for nothing because her mom didn't need her help and now she's no longer close to the other side. The mother and daughter make it across (of course) and fix the broken bridge so the other girls can cross it. One of the girls muses that they could have a chance to win and Phyllis tells the girls that they've already won because they didn't quit, they didn't cheat, and they didn't call home when they were in trouble; they worked as a team. 

While all of this is going on, Velda is spying on them with her binoculars and decides to take her girls through a short cut. Tori tells her it might be dangerous because the map says it's for hunters and trappers. Velda replies, "It's only dangerous when you don't know what you're doing" and mere seconds later she falls through a trap hole and is howling about her ankle. Cleo, her daughter, makes an executive decision to carry on without her because she's dead weight and assures her that after they win they'll send someone back for her, but Velda is not thrilled by this. She screams at her troop so loudly that Phyllis and her girls can hear her. Phyllis tell the girls, "It's probably just one of nature's beasts" and she's not too far off. Velda screams some more and Phyllis recognizes who it is and leads her troop towards the screaming. 

Tessa assess Velda's foot injury and seems to know an awful lot about podiatry for some reason. Her diagnosis is, "There's multiple contusions, possibly a cracked fibula, and a severe personality disorder." Ooh, burn! Phyllis wants to take her down for medical attention and Velda accuses her of wanting to know the quickest way to get there so they can win. The girls don't want to help her and think they should just leave her there and make her somebody else's problem. As Phyllis puts it, "It's a real moral dilemma." In a funny scene, the girls huddle, for like five seconds and you can hear someone say quite clearly, "I think we should leave her. She's a pain." Phyllis convinces them to help her and this is when the backpacks they debuted at the Wilderness Craft Day come in handy as they create a makeshift gurney with them for her to sit in. Despite Velda's constant griping, they march forth with her. 

Tessa's dad, the Hollywood director, is at the finish line with a camera and crew to film the whole thing and is shouting out directions for how he wants the shot to look. I would be so embarrassed if I were Tessa! Unsurprisingly, the Red Feathers are first and I laughed when Cleo says, "I'd like to say the other three teams gave us a real run for our money...but they didn't" after she claims the trophy. Also unsurprisingly, their win doesn't count since their troop leader wasn't with them and I saw that coming a mile away. After hearing this, Cleo grabs the trophy and runs away with it. 

Troop Beverly Hills are the second to arrive, but of course they are the real winners since everybody is accounted for. The head of the organization apologizes for not having a trophy for them and they say they don't need a trophy because all they wanted to do was prove that they were real Wilderness Girls. And they did. Awww. They are featured on the 1990 Wilderness Girls poster. Oh, and Phyllis and Freddy get back together. 

If you are curious to see all the outfits Phyllis Nefler wore, somebody ranked all of them.

Taylor Stan

I literally just bought Taylor Swift's new album, but haven't listened to it yet. However, when I woke up to the news this morning that her 8th studio album would be coming out at midnight (it's not even midnight here yet, hehe!), I made a list of my favorite 22 Taylor Swift songs. Ironically, "22" is not on this list, though it made the list when I made my 15 favorite Taylor Swift songs. However, that was three years ago and I only had five albums to choose songs from. This was very difficult; don't be mad if your favorite song isn't on there (but I bet it will be because everyone's favorite Taylor song is the same). 

You've Got Mail

Sleepless in Seattle

Director: Nora Ephron

Cast: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Bill Pullman, Rosie O'Donnell, Rita Wilson, Victor Garber, Rob Reiner, Gaby Hoffmann

Released: June 25, 1993

Oscar nominations: 

Best Original Screenplay - Nora Ephron, David S. Ward, and Jeff Arch (lost to Jane Campion for The Piano) 

Best Song - Marc Shaiman and Ramsay McLean for "A Wink and a Smile" (lost to "Streets of Philadelphia" by Bruce Springsteen for Philadelphia)

The only thing I remembered about this movie is the end where Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan meet at the Empire State Building. Ironically, for a movie called Sleepless in Seattle, I only remember the part that took place in New York. I was also trying to remember if Meg Ryan's character lived in Seattle (I knew Tom Hanks's character did), but then I realized that if they both lived in the same city, it wouldn't make any sense for them to meet in New York! 

This movie starts in Chicago at the funeral of the wife of Sam Baldwin (Tom Hanks). So right off the bat they want you to know he is now single. He decides he needs a change of scenery so he decides to move to Seattle with his eight-year-old son, Jonah. They don't really specify why he chooses to move to Seattle. He doesn't have any family there or likes the rain or says he got a job there, just seemed to randomly pick it. He and his son move into a house boat where he keeps a roll up map of the United State in the kitchen which he uses to teach his son geography. He gets a job as an architect and makes a friend named Jay (Rob Reiner) who teaches him about dating in the '90s. 

All the way on the other side of the country we meet Annie Reed (Meg Ryan), who lives in Baltimore and is engaged to Walter (Bill Pullman), a man the audience isn't supposed to like because he makes dopey jokes and is allergic to everything so he's always sneezing and blowing his nose. Yeah, not the most attractive, but despite his flaws he seems like a relatively nice guy. It's Christmas Eve and not only is Annie bringing Walter to meet her parents and family for the first time ever, but she also announces they're getting married. Does anyone else find this a bit odd that the family hadn't even met this guy while they were dating? We learn that Annie and Walter met at a sandwich shop when they both ordered a tomato and lettuce sandwich (why not just order a salad with a slice of bread?) and one of them had it on white and the other had it on wheat, but their orders got mixed up. Annie's mom gets out the wedding dress that her mom wore at her wedding because Annie wants to wear it and I'm thinking, girl, really? You really want to wear this very old fashioned and matronly dress to your wedding? Not only does it have long sleeves and a neckline that could almost be a turtleneck, but it looks like the top is a different material from the skirt. This moment is played as very sincere so it's not like we're supposed to laugh and feel bad for Annie in this hideous dress, but man, that dress is awful! Also, if I'm getting married, I want to wear my own NEW dress, I don't want to wear my mom's or grandmother's wedding dress. If they have a piece of jewelry for me, that's fine, but not the actual dress. I feel like this is a big troupe in movies, but it makes me wonder if this thing happens a lot in real life. 

After dinner, Annie and Walter leave and for some reason they're driving separate cars. There's really no reason for this except that the movie wants Annie to be listening to a Delilah-esque radio show called "You and Your Emotions" alone. The host is a woman named Dr. Marsha Fieldstone and the topic tonight is "Wishes and Dreams". Annie gets sucked into the show when Jonah calls in from Seattle and tells the host his wish is for his dad to have a new wife. He explains that his mom died and his dad has been very sad and hasn't been sleeping well which gives him the moniker "Sleepless in Seattle" (and the title of this movie, would you look at that!) Dr. Marsha Fieldstone wants to talk to Jonah's dad so he gets him. I'm honestly surprised that Sam didn't hang up the phone because that's what I would have done. Then I would have a very long talk with my child about calling national radio shows and airing my personal business for the whole country to hear! But Sam talks to her and he catches the attention of many women (including Annie) across the country as he talks about how in love he was with his wife, Maggie. He says when he took her hand to help her out of the car, "It was like coming home; only to no home I'd ever know." He also says it was like "magic" and Annie says that word at the same time, so this is supposed to tell the audience that Annie and Sam are meant to be. We'll see other instances of them where they're supposed to be meant for each other sprinkled in the movie. One example is when we see Annie peeling an apple with a knife in one long strip (I would be too scared to do that in fear that I would cut myself!) and in a later scene Sam will tell Jonah that his mother could "peel an apple in one long, curly strip."

The story goes viral (or whatever the equivalent of viral was in 1993) and Sam starts getting stacks of letters from admirers around the country. Apparently two thousand women have asked for his number. In the grand scheme, of things, 2000 is really just a drop in the bucket when it comes to the female population of the United Sates between 25-45 (my guess of the age range of the women who were writing him) in 1993, but on the other hand, 2000 letters is a lot for one guy to get. 

Jonah tells his dad that he gave out his address (um, that seems extremely dangerous...they could have some unstable woman stalking them (and in a way, they kinda do!)) and Sam (rightfully) asks, "What possessed you to give them our address?" Jonah says they called and asked for it. Sam asks how did they get their number and Jonah replies that you have to give your number to the radio show or they won't let you on the air. Okay, I need to unpack a few things here because I am a bit confused and if I missed something and somebody could clear this up for me, that would be great! I've never called in to a radio show so I don't know if you have to give them your number, but I guess it makes sense if your call becomes disconnected, or maybe it was just a plot device for this movie. I am shocked that the radio show gave out his number when women called asking for it. I feel like there's some law against that? Like a privacy law? I feel like Sam could have a lawsuit against this radio show and sue them for millions. Also, since these women already have his number, why are they calling just to ask for his address (I also find it amazing that Sam never picks up the phone when all these women have called; he must be a workaholic or something); why didn't they just ask to talk to Sam since they already have his number? I don't know; maybe I'm reading too much into this. I feel like there could have been a better way for this to be handled. 

Even though these women know that his name is Sam, all the letters begin with "Dear Sleepless in Seattle". Jonah helps his dad goes though the letters and one of them writes, "You're the most attractive man I've ever laid ears on" to which he rolls his eyes and throws the letter back. Yep, that would be my reaction as well! 

Back in Baltimore, where Annie works as a writer for The Baltimore Sun (presumably she writes fluff pieces) the "Sleepless in Seattle" story is getting a lot of attention. There's this weird line/"joke" where a couple of Annie's male colleagues are telling her that they heard a statistic that it's more likely for a woman to get killed in a terrorist attack than get married over the age of 40. This line was written as a joke (a bad one at that) and wasn't an actual fact, right? Because no way that is correct. I don't know anyone who's ever been killed in a terrorist attack. I know a lot of people who are married and while I don't know how old all of them were they wed, I'm sure there's at least one person who was over 40, so already that statistic is bullish*t. I did a bit of research and found that this was actually a statistic printed in a 1986 issue of Newsweek (and obviously not accurate...where do they even get the data to back that up?) and Nora Ephron was calling out how stupid it was. She probably should have just kept it out of the movie.

Annie and Walter make plans to meet in New York for Valentine's Day because he's going to be in Boston for a few days before the 14th. Annie has a friend named Becky (Rosie O'Donnell) who I think is her editor. Becky is not a fan of Walter and Annie keeps trying to tell her that Walter is a perfectly nice guy but even she has trouble convincing herself of that. Annie decides that she's going to write a letter to Sam and types one up on her typewriter (yes, typewriter; it wasn't even an electric one!) while she and Becky are watching An Affair to Remember. That movie plays a big role in this movie. I didn't even remember the name of it until Rita Wilson's character (who plays Sam's sister...kinda weird that a husband and wife are playing siblings, but I guess it would be way weirder if it were the other way around) mentions it. It seems all the female characters go gaga over this movie which I hated because it was such a stereotype that all women love mushy romantic movies. I've never seen An Affair to Remember, but from the few scenes they show of it here, it does not look like my cup of tea. It just looks boring. In another scene we'll see Sam's sister explaining the plot of the movie to Sam and her husband (Victor Garber) and ends up CRYING while she's talking about it. It's a great performance from Rita Wilson, but honestly, who has ever cried while explaining the plot of a movie? We will also see another scene of Jonah's little girlfriend, Jessica (Gaby Hoffmann) who is watching it and crying, declaring, "This is the best movie I've ever seen!" No, I'm sorry. No way an eight/nine-year-old child is going to say some old time-y romance movie from 1957 is the best movie they've ever seen. Not when Home Alone and Aladdin and The Mighty Ducks are most likely in her video rotation. Also she'll be changing her tune when she goes sees Jurassic Park that summer! I hated the whole An Affair to Remember subplot.

So Annie and Becky are watching the movie and they can both recite all the lines and Annie is swooning over the romance between Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr. Becky says the most meta line of the film: "You don't want to be in love, you want to be in love in a movie." I laughed when Annie reads the start of her letter to Becky: "Dear Sleepless and son, I have never written a letter like this in my life" and Becky replies, "That's what everyone writes at the beginning of letters to strangers." She also asks her, "What about Walter?" and Annie dreamily says, "I would give anything to marry Walter." Okay, so then why are you writing to this man you've never met or seen that lives three thousand miles away? Annie's reasoning is, "What if this man is my destiny and I never meet him?" Sometimes I was very confused about what Annie wanted. There's a scene in An Affair to Remember where the two leads meet at the Empire State Building and Becky tells her to write that she wants to meet him there on Valentine's Day. Annie thinks this is a great idea because she'll already be in New York with Walter that day and she'll be able to squeeze in it. Then she realizes what she just said and crumbles up the letter so at least she had that much sense.

Can we just pause here for a moment and talk about this letter from Sam's perspective. You get this letter from a woman who's asking you to fly all the way from Seattle to New York to meet her at a very crowded touristy spot. Um, I'm sorry, but I'm not paying however much it cost to fly from one end of the country to the other in 1993, plus the cost of admission to go up the ESB. Not to mention that a flight from Seattle to New York is a little over five hours long and I'm guessing that's not counting layovers, though I suppose there's probably continuous flights between both cities, but that's not the point. If I'm Sam, no way I'm flying all the way across the country to meet some random woman; I don't care how much she talks about "fate" and "magic". If she wants to meet me so much, then she should come to Seattle and if she wants to meet at a touristy destination with tons of people around, then meet me at the Space Needle. Or better yet, why not a coffee shop? I'm willing to bet there's at least ten within five minutes of Sam's home! But like I said, Annie tosses the letter to the side and Sam never receives it...or does he...? 

Sam starts dating a woman he works with named Victoria. The audience isn't supposed to like her because she "laughs like a hyena" (Jonah's words) and while she does have an annoying laugh, I found it more annoying that she seemed to find everything that Sam said hilarious funny even though it wasn't, so I guess the movie did a good job of making me think she was annoying. Other than that, she seemed like a perfectly nice woman. I guess since she and Walter are in the way of Annie and Sam finding true love with each other, we're supposed to root against them. Jonah is especially a little brat towards her and she is doing her best to be nice to him. There's a moment when he's spying on them when they come home after a date and are standing outside on the deck. Jonah calls Dr. Marsha Fieldstone's radio show to give her (and the entire country) a blow by blow of what's going on. He then screams bloody murder when he sees them kiss and calls Victoria a "ho". Seriously, kid? Also, if this were my kid, he would be grounded until he went to college. Sam is a pretty chill dad as his kid doesn't seem to have any discipline. I guess his wife took care of that. Becky calls Annie to turn on the radio and once again she gets very invested in the story and wants to know who Sam is kissing. 

Annie pretty much turns into a full on stalker when she tries to get information about Sam under the guise she's wring a piece about call in radio shows and another piece on how people handle bereavement. This gets her Sam's number (why didn't she just call the radio show since they were handing out his number like free candy?) and she calls his number where she gets a message from the machine where she learns his last name. She uses this information to look him up on an extremely archaic computer on an extremely archaic database called Nexus City News Bureau. Under "Enter Your Request", she types, "Find Samuel Baldwin" and gets 216 matches. Three things here: First, there's only 216 Samuel Baldwins in the entire United States of America? That's seems quite low; maybe Baldwin is a rare surname? The only Baldwins I'm aware of are Alec, Billy Stephen, and is there another Baldwin brother? Second, doesn't she already have Sam's address? Wasn't she going to send a letter to him before she decided not to? Wouldn't it just be easier to cross reference him with his address? Am I missing something here? Also, for a newspaper writer, Annie is an extremely SLOW typer. I swear, it takes her 30 seconds just to type "Samuel Baldwin".  She does narrow the search to include Jonah's name and gets four matches. From there, she's able to deduce that her Sam is an architect (so I guess there's that new fact she's learning). She sends a fax to a detective agency in Seattle asking for a background check along with a photo on Sam. Okay. I get the background check. You want to make sure the guy you're stalking isn't some crazy maniac, cuz, god forbid! But why does she need a photo? Remember, this pre-dates social media so she can't just look him up online, but the way she gets the photo is so weird and almost invading on Sam' privacy.

Let me lead into how his photo is obtained....Sam is getting ready to go on a date with Victoria (and this is the same date that ends with both of them on the dock and Jonah screaming when he sees them kissing) and Jonah is opening fan mail for his dad. There's one letter that's addressed to both him and his dad so he opens it and surprise, surprise, it's Annie's letter. Turns out Becky sent it. Jonah reads it and thinks it's the most amazing letter and this Annie woman is the woman for his dad. He wants his dad to read it, but Sam's in a hurry so he only reads part of it. Jonah thinks it's a sign because Annie talks about baseball and declares "Brooks Robinson was the best third baseman ever" and Sam also thinks that. So I had to look up who Brooks Robinson was and he played for the Baltimore Orioles in the '60s. Sam dismisses this and says that everyone think he was great. Yeah, I have a hard time believing that just because they like the same baseball player means they're meant for each other. Also, Annie is from Baltimore so of course she's going to like a ball player that played for her city. They don't give any other examples from the letter of why they're meant to be which means the writers of the movie couldn't think of any legitimate reason why these two are meant for each other aside from the fact that it's Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. So while Sam is having dinner with Victoria at the restaurant, the waiter comes by to tell Sam that he has a phone call. Young people, this is what happened before cell phones. You had to use a pay phone or the restaurant's phone to call someone. Turns out it's Jonah who asks his dad if they can go to New York on Valentine's Day because Annie wants to meet them there. Once again, Sam is pretty chill. He's annoyed that his son called him for basically nothing (like he couldn't wait to ask him this later?) I would have yelled at him for calling me during a date for a non-emergency. So this is when the photo of Sam is taken. A man who is on the second level of the restaurant with an extremely LOUD camera that makes whirring noises as he focuses the lens on his subject, then proceeds to make more LOUD sounds as he clicks the camera several times to snap a few photos. He's totally inconspicuous. Yes, that was sarcasm. 

Annie flies to Seattle because she wants to do a story on radio shows (not specifically Sam's story, but radio shows in general), but let's face it: she's going to Seattle to do some stalking, I mean sleuthing. A huge warning bell that she knows what she's doing is wrong is that she lies to Walter and tells him she's going to Chicago. The funniest part of the movie is when she's on the plane and the woman next to her asks, "Don't you just hate flying?" and Annie replies, Yes, I do. And I just told the most terrible one to the man I'm about to marry. Do you feel that any lie is a betrayal?" The woman just looks at her and says, "I said flying." 

It just so happens that Sam and Jonah are at Sea-Tac to see off Victoria who's going...somewhere for....something. I knew that as people started to stream off from a flight that just got in, that Annie was going to be one of those people, and what do you know, I was right! Shocker, I know! Annie doesn't see him, but Sam notices her and he's instantly attracted to her and starts following her, but quickly loses her in the crowd. Jonah tells him that Jessica believes that he [Sam] knew Annie in another life. He asks who Annie is which is quite ironic since he was just following her. I did laugh when Jonah says he knows this stuff because he's "younger and more pure so he's more in touch with cosmic forces." Of course that is what Jessica told him. 

Annie goes to Sam's address and sees them on a small boat in the water, so she jumps back in her car and watches them as she drives across a bridge and she's literally turning her head back so she's not watching for traffic. Lucky for her, there doesn't seem to be too many cars out wherever she is. She then proceeds to hide behind a small general store as she peeks out and watches the father and son play on the beach. She is being such a creeper! It was at this point that I knew there had to be a trailer cut of this movie as a horror/thriller film and I was right. She even tells Becky, "I watched them play on the beach" when she returns to Baltimore. If that doesn't scream stalker-ish, I don't know what does.

There is a moment when Annie is about to cross a busy street to talk to Sam who's at a parking lot of a marina and right before she has the nerve to do so, a woman who she thinks is Sam's girlfriend comes into view and hugs Sam and Jonah. Turns out it's just Sam's sister, Suzy, who is visiting from Chicago, but Annie doesn't know that. She does get the attention of Sam when a truck honks its horn at her because she standing in the middle of a busy street like an idiot. They lock eyes and have a moment as they say "hello" to each other. Then the next scene is her back in Baltimore telling Becky what happened. She claims she just got back in her car and left. Remember this scene because I'm going to come back to it later.

So the young kids have written a letter to Annie pretending to be Jonah's dad and Annie soon receives the letter. This is when she learns that Becky sent her original letter. The letter reads, "Dear Annie, Thanks for the letter. It was great. You sound neat. We're very excited about meeting you in New York on Valentine's Day and seeing if we're MFEO. See you soon." Ha, I can only imagine how Annie, a writer, felt about receiving such an immature letter from a man she feels a connection to. I have to say that Jessica is ahead of her time. She was into using acronyms way before texting was even a commonplace thing. I don't think I've ever come across MFEO but right away I knew it stood for "made for each other". Sometimes her acronyms didn't work so well, like she she meets Jonah's dad for the first time and snottily says, "H and G", then has to clarify that it stands for "hi and goodbye". Honey, if you have to explain your acronyms, then, IDK, maybe don't use them? 

Jonah is still pestering his dad about going to New York to meet Annie, but Sam is not going to fly across the country to meet some woman he doesn't even know. Understandable. I did get a laugh when he asks Jonah if he saw Fatal Attraction and Jonah replies "You wouldn't let me!" as if he legitimately did want to see it. Glad that Sam put his foot down on that one; not an appropriate movie for an eight-year-old! 

Jonah and Jessica decide to take matters in their own hands. Since Jessica's parents are travel agents, she uses their database to book Jonah a flight to New York on the 14th. Turns out February 14, 1993 was on a Sunday so at least he wasn't missing any school! They pool their money (a little over $100) to pay for the flight, taxi fare, and ticket to go up the Empire State Building. I'm pretty sure that wouldn't be enough to pay for all of those even in 1993 currency, so I'm not really sure where they got the rest of the money to pay for all of that. I'm guessing Jessica stole one of her parents' credit cards. She puts down that Jonah is twelve so he won't have to have a chaperone. For some reason, even without Jonah's documentation, she is able to book him a flight which seems a little insane. They really kind of gloss over this. Look, I know that just a few months earlier the same plot line was in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York when Macaulay Culkin flies to New York by himself. But in defense of Kevin McCallister (I can't believe I'm saying this), it wan't his fault that he went to New York. It was an ACCIDENT. He wasn't purposely booking tickets to go to New York and deceiving his father. He just got separated from his dad at the airport and followed some random dude who he thought was his dad onto the wrong plane. And he ran into the woman taking boarding passes and everything got mixed up. It could happen to anyone! Also, the Home Alone movies are almost set in a fantasy world (if you can survive several bricks hitting you on the head, you're not in a realistic movie!) and Kevin McCallister can get away with surviving the streets of New York by himself. Jonah does not process the street smarts that Kevin has and Sleepless in Seattle seems to be set in a more realistic world than Home Alone 2. What I'm saying is that I find this entire subplot extremely absurd. How did Jonah even get to the airport? We just see Jessica buying him a ticket, then the next thing you know he's on a plane Also, NOBODY, NOT ONE SINGLE ADULT, seems to be concerned that this young boy is by himself in New f**king York. I've been to New York. It's a big city. I know, duh. But I cannot imagine being eight-years-old and just getting around by myself. But he's all chipper as he hails a cab to take him to the Empire State Building. The taxi driver asks him what he's going to do there and Jonah replies, "I'm going to meet my new mother." If I were that taxi driver, I would have so many questions, but he just continues to drive. So we see Jonah reach the top and he starts going to every woman in her thirties and asking them if they're Annie. I really feel like this plan was not seen through. First of all, the letters never said a specific TIME to meet. It just said "Valentine's Day". You dummies know there are 24 hours in a day, right? Also, they never specified a certain AREA to meet, just the Empire State Building. Well, I guess they did say at the top, but they still could have been a tad more specific.

Back in Seattle, Sam is ready to go on a little getaway with Victoria. Clarice, the baby-sitter, has just arrived. Sam begins to panic when he can't find Jonah and goes over to Jessica's house where she admits where Jonah is and says he left on the 7:30 flight which is leaving at that moment. Sam books the next flight to New York and he's probably two or three hours behind. 

Meanwhile, in New York, Annie and Walter are having a romantic Valentine's dinner at the Rainbow Room at Rockefeller Plaza with a view of the Empire State Building that has a huge red heart hologram projected on it. Off screen, Annie tells Walter about Sam and when they come back to them he pretty much tells Annie he needs to go find him. He is taking this break up extremely well which makes me think he wanted to break up with her all along and is relieved that she did it for him. So she decides to mosey on over to the ESB to meet her new future husband and stepson. 

While this is going on, Sam has found Jonah. The ESB is closing so they get on the elevator to go back down. While THAT is going on, Annie is trying to convince the man selling tickets to let her up even though he tells her the building is closed. She mentions An Affair to Remember and the man tells her that's his wife's favorite movie, because of course it is. Because every female in this movie has to love that movie. Just as Sam and Jonah are going down the elevator, Annie is on the other one, getting off at the top. There's clearly no one there, but she asks to look around and finds an abandoned backpack. Now in these days, a bomb squad would be called if such a thing was found at the ESB, but she just goes over and picks it up and finds a teddy bear inside. Of course it belongs to Jonah and he and Sam come back up to retrieve it and that's when everyone is finally united (or re-united?) Annie and Sam take each other's hands and keep looking at each other in this extremely awkward way as they make their way back to the elevator. The movie ends as we assume they're about to start their new life together. 

Did you know that Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan share less than two minutes of screen time together in this? That is insane, but it makes sense since they're only together at the end and for a few seconds when she's in Seattle. I mentioned before that I do not like An Affair to Remember being a big plot device of this movie. I also don't like New York being the big set piece for the ending. The movie is called Sleepless in Seattle; maybe utilize the city that's in the title of your movie. If Nora Ephron wanted New York to be a part of this movie, she should have set it there and named it Not Napping in New York; though that doesn't have the same ring to it. 

Remember I told you to remember the scene where Annie and Sam see each across the street in Seattle? Well, when that happens, there's 30 minutes of the movie left. Instead of Annie flying back to Baltimore, this is where I would have had them meet. Get rid of Suzy in this scene and maybe have Sam save Annie from an oncoming truck. Here they can begin their romance and we can have a cute montage of them falling in love in Seattle. Maybe we see them sharing a kiss at the top of the Space Needle! Maybe we see Annie almost getting hit in the head with a flying fish at Pike Place Market! Maybe we see them get caught in the rain without an umbrella! Maybe we see them go to ten different coffee shops in one day! Maybe they hold hands as they walk through Pioneer Square! Maybe they go whale watching! Maybe they take a ferry boat to Roche Harbor for a romantic weekend! Maybe they go fishing off his house boat deck! Maybe we see Sam give geography lessons to Annie too! The possibilities are endless! And we can still have some drama. Maybe Annie admits to Sam that she hired a detective to look into him and he becomes angry. Maybe Annie has to figure out how to break it off with Walter. Maybe they have a fight over where they're going to live, Seattle or Baltimore. I mean, I think the choice is pretty obvious. I've been to both Seattle and Baltimore more than once and as much I liked Baltimore, Seattle is way cooler. Then, at the end of the movie, you could either have them getting engaged or even getting married, take your pick. There. Much better movie! You get rid of all the women sobbing over An Affair to Remember and you get rid of the ridiculous plot line of an eight-year-old child flying to New York by himself. And you have Annie and Sam forming a genuine relationship. I am a genius. You're welcome!