BHPD

Beverly Hills Cop

Director: Martin Brest

Cast: Eddie Murphy, Judge Reinhold, John Ashton, Ronny Cox, Steven Berkoff, Jonathan Banks

Released: December 5, 1984

Oscar nomination:

Best Original Screenplay - Daniel Petrie Jr. and Danilo Bach (lost to Robert Benton for Places in the Heart)

Beverly Hills Cop II

Director: Tony Scott

Cast: Eddie Murphy, Judge Reinhold, John Ashton, Ronny Cox, Brigitte Nielsen, Dean Stockwell, Paul Reiser, Jurgen Prochnow

Released: May 20, 1987

Oscar nomination: 

Best Original Song - "Shakedown" by Harold Faltermeyer, Keith Forsey, and Bob Seger  (lost to ("I've Had) the Time of My Life" by Frank Previte, John DeNicola, and Donald Markowitz from Dirty Dancing)

Beverly Hills Cop III

Director: John Landis

Cast: Eddie Murphy, Judge Reinhold, Hector Elizondo, Timothy Carhart, Stephen McHattie 

Released: May 25, 1994

Cue the synthesizers and other '80s electronic instruments because it's time to head to Beverly Hills with Axel Foley as I review the Beverly Hills Cop trilogy (soon to have a fourth!). I don't think any of these movies are particularly good, but they are fun to watch (well, the first two anyway!) and you can tell when Eddie Murphy improvises during a scene and those are some of the funniest scenes in the films. 

When watching the first movie, there were only five actors I was familiar with:

1. Eddie Murphy, obviously.

2. Judge Reinhold - I probably couldn't tell you anything he's been in unless I looked up his filmography, but I'm definitely familiar with his name. I do remember he was in The Sant Clause movies.

3. Bronson Pinchot - It's Balki from Perfect Strangers! 

4. Paul Reiser - he looks younger than his My Two Dads character, much younger than his Mad About You character, and way younger than his Stranger Things character! 

5. Jonathan Banks  - yes, Mike Ehrmantraut (from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul for those who may not know) is in this! Actually, I didn't recognize him at all and it was only when I was watching the credits that I realized he was in this.

Axel Foley (a very young (and skinny!) Eddie Murphy) is a cop who lives in Detroit. This little detail surprised me, as I assumed he lived in California since the movie is called Beverly Hills Cop. The movie opens with Axel going undercover in a sting operation and it ends up in a high speed car chase (set to The Pointer Sisters' "Neutron Dance"; what is a Neutron dance anyway?). He does this without any authorization and his boss, Inspector Todd, is livid. Before he gets chewed out by him, Axel's fellow cop, Jeffrey (played by a very young Paul Reiser) tries to warn him that he's about to get it and right before Inspector Todd comes into the locker room to yell at Axel, Jeffrey turns around and pretend to be interested in the lockers. At one point, he (stupidly) intervenes in the conversation and Todd snaps at him that this is none of his business. He turns back to the lockers and exclaims, "This is not my locker!" This will come back in the second movie which was a nice nod to this scene. 

Inspector Todd tells Axel that if he ever does anything like that again, he will be fired. 

When Axel returns home, he notices the door to his apartment is slightly ajar. If that happened to me, I would be freaked out! However, being a cop, Axel has a gun, so he takes it out and scopes out his apartment. Luckily, he doesn't have anything to worry about because it's just an old friend of his named Mikey (which I didn't get his name until way later so maybe I missed it when we first meet him) who's sitting in his kitchen, eating. Actually, he does have to worry about Mikey wasting his electrical bill because he has the refrigerator door propped open. I'm guessing the A/C must be broken and he's doing that to keep cool, but, dude,' c'mon! Everyone knows you don't leave the fridge door open longer than is necessary. 

We quickly find out that Mikey was in jail for breaking and entering, but he was released a year early and has already been out for six months where he's spent some time in California (Beverly Hill, I presume!). They haven't seen each other in two years. Mikey shows Axel a stack of "untraceable bearer bonds worth 10,000 Deutschmarks." Axel asks if he stole them, then quickly rescinds his questions, saying he doesn't even want to know. I have no idea how much that is worth in US dollars, but considering that Germany uses the Euro now I don't think this will be a great future investment! In fact, this will be a fatal investment for Mikey. I'm sorry, but this guy seems like a real dumbass. 

But before Mikey meets his demise, at least he will have a fun night out with Axel as they go out to drink beer and shoot some pool. We get some more exposition as Mikey tells Axel he was in Beverly Hills (aha! I was right!) as a security guard. He was hired by a mutual friend of theirs, a woman named Jenny Summers who's the manager of a super fancy art gallery. Later, we will find out that Jenny's boss hired him as a favor for her. I guess Jenny didn't tell her boss that he did time for stealing because who the hell would hire this guy? 

They're both drunk when they return to Axel's apartment and as he's trying to unlock his door, two guys ambush them from both sides, knocking Axel out. They roughhouse Mikey and slam him against the wall and grab the bag he's carrying with the bonds in it (I love how he's just conveniently carrying them around). Mikey clearly knows who they are and tells them he was going to bring them back (yeah, right!); that he only took a couple stacks and didn't think they would miss them. Oh, they missed them, alright! They shoot him in the head right in the middle of the hallway. One of the guys who kills him is played by Jonathan Banks, and like I mentioned, the first time I saw this, it didn't even register with me that was him, but when I watched it again to take notes and knew this time he was in it, I definitely saw him. He's younger (but still old, if that makes sense) and has a lot more hair, but you can tell by the eyes and the voice. 

Somebody must have called the police because the next thing you know they're at the apartment and Axel is outside talking to Inspector Todd. He's really lucky that they just didn't kill him too, but then I guess we wouldn't have a movie. Or it would have been a very different movie! Todd warns Axel not to get involved in this case so Axel asks if he can take some vacation time which he's granted, but Todd tells him if he finds out he's butting into the case, "it will be the longest vacation [he] ever heard of." 

Now we see palm trees so we know Axel is in Beverly Hills. You would think that since he lives in Detroit, he would fly out to California, right? Wrong! He drives all the way out there in his crappy car, a Chevy Nova. It's 2,300 miles from Detroit to Beverly Hills. Who would drive that distance when you can fly out there in about five hours? (Still a long flight, but much better than driving!) 

After he obtains a hotel room he clearly can't afford, he goes to the art gallery where Jenny works. Before he's reunited with her, he meets Serge (Bronson Pinchot) who works at the gallery. He has some Eastern European accent (perhaps he hails from the Greek isle of Mypos?) and calls Axel "Ack-swell". Serge is only in two scenes, but he leaves a memorable impression. He is hilarious; when he sees a fellow co-worker with too many buttons on his shirt left open, he tells him to button it up because it's not sexy (and I loved when Axel agrees with him); when he tells Axel how much a piece of art work went for, Axel says, "Get the f*** out of here!" (because it's a very high price for a very odd piece!), he replies, "No, I cannot!" which cracked me up. He also offers Axel a cup of espresso with "a twist of lemon", but Axel politely declines. 

Axel and Jenny (as we'll learn in a later scene) know each other because they grew up in the same neighborhood. I guess Mikey was also part of this friend group too? IDK. Axel has to break the news to her that Mikey is dead and this is when we find out that her boss, Victor Maitland (Steven Berkoff), who is one of the top art dealers in the U.S., hired him as a favor to her and Mikey worked at the gallery warehouse. 

Axel shows up at Maitland's office building posed as a delivery man with flowers and tells the receptionist that "it's imperative" that Mr. Maitland get the flowers (why? they're just flowers!) and goes to deliver them himself even though she tells him that all deliveries are left on the desk. He barges into the office and gets to the point when he tells him he needs to ask him some questions about Michael Tandino and explains that he was in Detroit and someone killed him. Maitland's exclamation of "Oh my God! That's terrible!" isn't convincing at all. He confirms that Mikey did work for him and when Axel still probes for information, he tells him that the authorities in Detroit should look into this and that he needs to get back to work. This must be the cue for his six guards to grab him and throw him out the window. A bit excessive, especially with people in the lobby witnessing all of this. One guard leading him out the front door would have sufficed. 

The cops come to take him to the police department as he's been charged with having a weapon (they find a gun on him) and disturbing the peace. He's pretty outraged about the latter since he was thrown out a window! After spending some time in a cell (with a pay phone which he makes a joke about wanting to order a pizza; yes the pay phone is in the actual cell), they let him out. On the outside, the Beverly Hills Police Department is a very ornate building and on the inside, it's very high-tech (especially for 1984!). 

He's introduced to sergeants John Taggart (John Ashton) and Billy Rosewood (Judge Reinhold) who question him why he didn't identify himself as a police officer when he was arrested and Axel replies he was just minding his own business, but Taggart informs him that six witnesses saw him come in and tear up the place, then jump out the window. Let me guess: those six "witnesses" were the six security/body guards. Taggart and Axel don't get off on the right foot as the Beverly Hills cop tells Axel he's more likely to believe an established businessman than some "foul mouthed jerk from out of town." Axel answers withs a foul-mouthed response. They get into a squabble and Taggart punches him in the gut. From his office, Taggart's and Rosewood's boss, Lieutenant Bogomil (Ronny Cox,) sees this and after having a word with Taggart, he (Taggart) apologizes to Axel. Bogomil introduces himself to Axel and asks him if he would like to press charges against Taggart, but he says where he comes from, police officers don't do that to other police officers. Bogomil asks why he didn't inform them why he was in town and he tells them he's on vacation. When asked why he was in Maitland's office, Axel says he had to use the bathroom and thought that would be a good place. I don't know, that sounds kind of like a weak excuse. If you're walking down a street, are you going to go into an office building to use the bathroom? I mean, maybe, but I'd feel like you're more likely to use either a public bathroom or one at a restaurant or a fast food place. Bogomil asks if he always takes his gun on vacation and Axel replies that he's never been on vacation before, but in Detroit "cops are required to carry a firearm at all times." Bogomil informs him he had just been talking on the phone with Inspector Todd and that he's supposed to give him the message that if he's investigating the Tandino murder, then he shouldn't bother coming back to Detroit. Axel stills insists he's only in Beverly Hills on vacation. 

This is totally random and has nothing to do with the movie, but the name "Bogomil" reminded me of something and it finally dawned on me that it sounds a lot like Gargamel, you know, as in the villain from The Smurfs. 

Jenny pays for Axel's bail and takes him back to his hotel. During the drive, Axel notices the cops are following them and they park on the opposite side of the street of the hotel. In his room, Axel orders room service (the bay shrimp salad sandwich and the cold poached salmon in dill sauce) and instructs them to take it to the car with Taggart and Rosewood. This is all to distract them as Axel sneaks in behind their car and puts a couple of bananas in their tail pipe so the car stalls when they try to follow Axel and Jenny who drive to Maitland's warehouse where Axel finds a crate full of coffee grounds. They have to hide from some guys coming in with a box, but from where he's hiding, he's able to see that it's full of the bearer bonds that Mikey had. They follow them to what Jenny tells Axel is a "bonded warehouse", where they "hold foreign shipments until they clear customs." Axel tells a reluctant Jenny to take the car (it's her car they took, btw) and go home because he wants to check out the place. I know he doesn't want Jenny to be in harm's way if things go bad, but my first thought was how is he going to get back to his hotel? 

He walks inside, not trying to be sneaky, and when a security officer spots him, Axel smiles at him and asks how he's doing, then asks the man if he can get his supervisor and flashes his badge. The guy gets the supervisor and Axel introduces himself as "Inspector Rafferty, United States Custom Service" and asks him if all this stuff has passed through customs and the guy tells him this is "the bonded area." Axel wants him to answer a question for him: "How can a black man, dressed like me (he's wearing jeans, t-shirt, and unzipped hoodie), just march into your warehouse, walk into the bonded area and start poking around without anyone asking me any questions whatsoever?" It cracked me up when the supervisor replies "I don't know" and he says that's the answer he was looking for. He takes their ID badges from them and tells them somebody's gonna lose their job over this. He informs them he does "security checks all over the nation" and this one has the worst security in the nation right behind Cleveland. I'm sure back in 1984, the people of Cleveland watching this in the theaters had a big chuckle over this line. He tells them they're going to check the background of each and every crate in the section, starting with the one he's already picked out that he knows belongs to Maitland.  

It's amazing how they just go along with this and don't even ask to see his credentials, but I guess things were different back in the '80s. Or maybe it's just for the convenience of the plot and people really weren't that dumb back then. 

Meanwhile, Bogomil is furious about the banana incident and orders that Taggart and Rosewood wait for Axel to return to the hotel. We get a funny scene of them in the car where Rosewood shares the information from the magazine article he's reading: "By the time the average American is 50, he's got five pounds of undigested red meat in his bowels." Taggart asks him why he thinks he would want to hear this (my thoughts exactly!) and Rosewood replies, "You eat a lot of red meat." That "fact" (if indeed it is true; I was too scared to fact check it on the Internet for fear of what I might find!) is so gross! Kinda makes me glad I don't eat much red meat (I may have 2-3 steaks a year, if that!).

After he gets the info he needs, Axel returns to the hotel and sees the cop in their car and hops in the backseat (guess they don't keep their doors locked!). They're still a bit salty with Axel (especially Taggart) because his banana stunt docked them two days' pay. That sucks for them since it really wasn't their fault. Axel apologizes and says they should all be working together since they're cops and suggests they "all go get something to drink and make up and be friends" 

They end up at a strip club which will be a staple of the Beverly Hills Cop franchise. Axel shows them the coffee grounds, but they don't know what they mean. That's quickly forgotten when Axel looks over and sees two shady guys enter, both wearing long black leather coats. One of them stays by the bar and the other walks towards the back, leaning against the wall. Axel points out the guy near the wall to Taggart and asks him if he thinks it's odd he's wearing a coat in June. He points out the other guy and tells him something's about to go down and asks him to cover the guy against the wall. He walks towards the guy at the bar and shouts "Phillip!" and pretends to know him as he loudly yells and makes a racket. The guy tells him to get out of his way and stops the music (which, thank God cuz that "Nasty Girl" song was awful!), then takes out his gun and the other guy does the same. Axel has his hands up but is still acting like he knows the guy. The guy comes closer to him and Axel grabs his gun and whacks him with it; meanwhile Taggart takes out his gun and points it at the other guy. They arrest the two guys and everyone claps as Taggart apologizes for the disturbance. I guess these two guys were planning on robbing the place. When I first watched this, I thought these guys were connected to Maitland, but nope, just two random guys whose plot was foiled. 

When they return to the police department, Bogomil is livid and wants to know what they were doing at a strip club out of their jurisdiction while they were on duty. Axel cuts in to tell him they were there because the other two were following him and that's where he went. They waited outside while he was inside and the only reason they went inside was because "they saw two suspicious-looking gentlemen with bulges in their jackets going into the place." He had no idea what was going on, but Taggart and Rosewood "were able too stop them." It's a very good, believable story, but when Bogomil asks the two sergeants if that's what really happened, Taggart, who apparently cannot lie, tells him no and tells him the true story and that it was Foley who saw the suspects and that he's the one who deserves credit for the arrests. Bogomil tells Taggart and Rosewood they're off the case and has two other cops keep an eye on Foley. 

The next morning, Axel orders coffee and doughnuts from room service to be delivered to the new set of cops and he sneaks away in his car, but they're on to him and follow him to Victor Maitland's house. During this scene, you can see a DeLorean parked on the curb. Besides being useful for a time machine, the DeLorean has to be one of the most impractical cars ever made. You can only parallel park because of those doors and who wants to parallel park? But the sight of it made me laugh because of course some rich dude (because you know it's a guy) in Beverly Hills is going to own a DeLorean in the '80s. While they're busy chatting, they see a car leave the house and Axel follows it and they follow Axel, but he's able to lose them. 

 

Axel follows him to a fancy, members-only restaurant and when he goes in, he acts very flamboyant and tells the maitre d' he's looking for Victor Maitland and the man replies if he tells him the message, he can relay it to Mr. Maitland. Axel gives him his message: "Tell Victor that Ramon, the fella he met about a week ago, went to the clinic today, and I found out that I have herpes simplex ten. And I think Victor should go check himself out with his physician to make sure everything is fine before things start falling off." Not surprisingly, the maitre d' tells Axel he better tell Victor himself. Yeah, I don't blame him, that's not the kind of information you want to be delivering as the middleman, but I would be a little suspicious if I were the restaurant employee because I'd be thinking, this is not the time or place to be relaying this news. 

Victor is seated with Zach (that's young Mike Ehrmantraut...lol, now I'm picturing him saying "Axel" in the same way he says "Walter"....you know what I mean if you've seen Breaking Bad!) and the henchman gets up and tells Axel to get out out and they start slapping each other, then Axel grabs him and throws him into the nearby buffet table that's full of fruit and sliced strawberries, lemons, kiwis, bananas, and watermelon go flying everywhere. If I were one of the prep cooks who had spent all morning cutting all that fruit, I would be pissed! The other diners around them are just staring at them, but besides that, there's really no reaction. 

Axel tells Victor that he knows he's into shady stuff and is pretty certain that he had Mikey killed. Vitor replies that he has no idea who he's dealing with and tells him to go back to Detroit. At that point, the police come to take Axel away, so apparently somebody must have called them. 

Back at the police headquarters, Bogomil asks Axel why he keeps harassing Maitland and he tells him about Mikey and his suspicions of Maitland having him killed and adds, "I can't prove that right now, but when I do, you'll be the first to know." He also tells him about the bearer bonds and Bogomil doesn't think that proves anything. Axel says that Maitland is "not an investor, he's a smuggler" and that the crate that he saw didn't pass through Customs, but rather "Maitland is paying someone so his guys can get his shipments out of Customs before they get inspected" and when his guys get their hands on it, "they take the drugs or the bonds out of the crate and send it back before Customs even knows what's going on." When asked, Axel confirms he witnessed all that, except he didn't see any drugs, but he did see coffee grounds which drugs are sometimes packed in because the scent throws off the dogs. By-the-books Bogomil says they don't have a search warrant to inspect the warehouse and tells Taggart to start checking this out. Axel points out that if they start snooping around, Maitland will just close down and move his shipments somewhere else. 

However, Police Chief Hubbard want Axel to be escorted out of city limits because he's had enough of his shenanigans and Rosewood is ordered to drive him out of Beverly Hills. In the car, Axel tells him that Maitland is expecting another shipment in today and wants Billy to drive him to the art gallery so she can let them in the warehouse. Rosewood asks how can he be sure if the shipment will contain drugs and Axel replies that he's "got a hunch". It doesn't take much for him to convince Billy to take the detour. 

At the gallery, we get another humorous scene with Serge when Axel asks him to get Rosewood an espresso. He asks him if he wants a lemon twist and Billy replies sure, if it's no bother, and Serge replies, "No, don't be stupid." Jenny tells Axel that Maitland had come by earlier that day to ask about Axel and wanted to know where Foley was staying because he had "some helpful information" but she claimed she didn't know. She want go go to the warehouse with them, but Axel says it's too dangerous and adds that he doesn't have time to argue. Jenny replies, "Let me get my keys and we'll argue on the way" which is a line that made me laugh.

They drive to the warehouse and Axel tells Billy to stay in the car and observe. He can't go in because he's a cop and if he goes in "without probable cause, they'll call it an illegal search." He asks Jenny if there's any chance she can give him the key so he can go in by himself, but she says "no chance" and goes in with him. They check out the crate and he finds one from overseas that hasn't passed through Customs yet and opens it with a crowbar. Inside are coffee grounds and under those are plastic bags of a white powder substance which I'm sure isn't sugar! Axel is sure too when he takes his pinkie to taste it. Uh...pretty sure cops aren't allowed to do that! At that moment, two guys show up and one points a gun at Axel's head. In the car, Rosewood sees Maitland, Zach, and some other goons show up and go inside. Maitland tells his men to take Jenny to the car. Everyone but the first two men who were already there get in the car and drive off. Rosewood goes in and hears Axel coughing as he's being hit in the stomach by one of the men. He shoots at one guy and Axel is able to get free and take a swing at the other guy. They are able to get out and run to the car where Rosewood gets on the radio and tells dispatch to have Taggart check out the warehouse and act on whatever he finds. Taggart has other plans and tells the two cops who were assigned to follow Axel the second time to check out the warehouse and he drives to Maitland's house (because he knows that's where Axel and Billy are headed) and when he arrives there, he sees the two cops breaking into the back gate. After they explain to them Jenny has been kidnapped and she's in the house (I'm not really sure how they knew Maitland took her to his house; I guess it was just a lucky guess or I missed something), Taggart tells them they need a search warrant and they can get it in twenty minutes. Axel replies they may not have that much time and he's going in, regardless, and Rosewood says he's going in too. Taggart tells Billy that if he's lucky, the worst thing that will happen to him is that he'll just get fired. He decides that he's going in too and goes to get his guns from the trunk. Inside, two security guards see that there are people in the backyard with guns and they alert other men who work for Maitland and they come out with guns to check what's going on. 

Axel sneaks up the stairs that leads to the back of the house while Taggart and Rosewood go around a large stone wall. They try to climb it, but it's too high. There's a hilarious moment where Taggart gets on Rosewood's shoulders after Billy gives him a boost, but Billy can't keep his balance and he's stumbling and they fall. Eventually, they are able to get over. You can tell it's a different wall, because from their side of the fence, it's a solid white wall, but when you're seeing them from Axel's point of view, it's not solid and there are decorative slabs. 

There's lot of gun firing. A few bad guys are shot, but mostly the decorative gardening vases and statues are getting the brunt of it. This is the most gaudy pool area I've ever seen. There's huge statues everywhere. At one point, Rosewood stands up with his badge and yells, "Police! You're all under arrest!" but they don't care and continue to shoot at him so he has to dive for cover. They cover Axel as he makes his way into the house. There's no way the interior of this house is the same one they use for the outside. For a Beverly Hills mansion of an art collector, the rooms just feel small and uninspiring. He kills Zach after he's being fired at, then Maitland shows up and starts shooting at Axel. 

Meanwhile, Bogomil finds out that they're at Maitland's residence and he and many other cops show up a few minutes later. 

Back in the house, Maitland has grabbed Jenny with a gun to her head, but then Bogomil pops in and yells "Freeze!" and Jenny elbows a surprised Maitland and is able to get away and both Axel and Bogomil shoot him dead. This time, when Billy yells, "Police! You're all under arrest!", they put their weapons down and their hands up because many police officers are swarming the area. Rosewood's smug reaction is pretty funny.

Police Chief Hubbard shows up and wants to know what's going on, excuse me, he wants to know "what the hell's going on?" He spots Axel and demand to know why he isn't in custody. Bogomil tells him he can explain everything and makes up a story that Jenny "accidentally discovered large quantities of a substance she suspected was cocaine in the art gallery's warehouse" and she told Axel who was "cooperating at the time in a joint Beverly Hills-Detroit investigation of narcotics trafficking." He and Rosewood responded to her report and "discovered approximately 80 kilos of cocaine". Rosewood called for backup and he dispatched their officers to this location which Taggart was first to arrive and "having probable cause to believe a felony was in progress" they "proceeded to enter the grounds" and they shot several suspects to defend themselves. Hubbard wants to hear from Taggart if he can confirm that story since it was established earlier that he has a penchant for telling the truth, but Taggart says that's what happened. 

After Hubbard leaves, Axel asks Bogomil if he could call Inspector Todd and straighten things out for him and he tells him he'll do that in the morning. I really thought he was going to offer Axel a job and that's how he became a Beverly Hills cop, hence the title! Axel checks out of his hotel room and he's lucky that the BHPD paid for it! 

That's the end of the first movie, now on to Beverly Hills Cop II which follows a similar formula to the first movie, but is a bit more convoluted. The movie is directed by Tony Scott so there are more actions scenes with sh*t blowing up and you can tell they had a bit more money for production. 

It's two years later and Axel is still living in Detroit as a cop and is working undercover on an assignment with fake credit cards. We learn that he's kept in touch with Bogomil, Taggart, and Rosewood; he even has to cancel a fishing trip he had planned with Bogomil. Okay, I can buy that maybe he sends Christmas cards or talks to them on the phone every few months, but visits? Yeah, that seems a bit much. He even seems to be very friendly with Bogomil's adult daughter, Jan, who we meet in this movie. They obviously just added her as a character they needed because it was never mentioned before that he had a daughter. 

In the first movie, Axel was brought to Beverly Hills because of the murder of a friend; this time he comes to Beverly Hills because Bogomil was shot and Axel knew he had been working on a case and thinks it may have to do with him being shot. 

Because of the way a case was handled, Lutz, the new police chief, has suspended Bogomil; and Taggart and Rosewood have been demoted to traffic duty. At one point, he calls Rosewood "Roseweed" which made me giggle. On his way home, Bogomil is followed by a tall, attractive woman with dark hair and sunglasses, but she must have gotten in front of him because he sees her parked on the curb in a residential area (I'm assuming his). Her hood is open as though she has car trouble and he pulls over to offer help. As he's checking out the engine, another car pulls up and she hands him a piece of paper with "B" written on it and asks him what he thinks of it and the guy driving by shoots at him. He grabs at her and pulls off the wig she's wearing to reveal she's a blonde and she shoots him in the chest. I gasped, thinking for sure he was dead, but he actually makes it out okay by the end of the movie, so he must have been wearing a bullet proof vest. 

The tall blonde woman that shot him is the same tall blonde woman we saw rob a fancy jewelry store at the beginning of the movie. Well she didn't do any of the stealing; the masked men who were with her did all that while she just kept shouting how much time they had until the police arrived ("Two minutes! One thirty!"). On her way out, she left a pink carnation and a card with the letter "A" on the back of the manager. The man is alive, but he was ordered to "eat the floor". It cracked me up seeing this nicely dressed, polished woman use such boorish language. Yes, I realize she's involved in a heist, but its not like she's really doing any of the dirty work! The "A" stands for the name of the jewelry store (and presumably the last name of the owner), Adriano. With the "B" card found on Bogomil, the two crimes are connected and are quickly dubbed the Alphabet Crimes. It was really lucky that Bogomil wasn't named, like, Zogomil in the first movie or else they'd have to think of something else! 

Axel finds out about the shooting of Bogomil on TV. Why would this be on the news in Detroit? Seems like that would be more local news, not national news. But I guess they need to have him find out, although I'm sure Taggart or Rosewood or Jan would have called him to tell him. Yeah, that would make way more sense. This is when we find out that he's "going to be okay" and Rosewood tells him about "the Alphabet Bandit" and that he and Taggart aren't on the case. 

Before Axel leaves for Beverly Hills, he asks Jeffrey (that's Paul Reiser's character, remember) to have him tell Inspector Todd (that's his boss, remember) that he's pursing his credit card bust. When he arrives in the ritzy town, we're shown a bunch of Beverly Hills cliches like expensive cars and Rodeo Drive. The one that stuck out to me in particular was an attractive woman walking her little dog down the sidewalk. Not only is she wearing heels (ridiculous! She must only be walking her dog down to the end of the street and back), but she's wearing a leotard and tights and it looks like she has the world's worst wedgie (try saying that three times fast!). I know this because they show a close up of her ass...I guess we're supposed to think it's sexy? Yeah, it's not. Serge would not think it's sexy, heh! (And no, Serge is not in this movie because Pinchot was filming Perfect Strangers.) 

Axel sees a mansion under construction and pulls up to it. Once again, he manages to convince a group of people that he's someone he's not. He quickly learns the name of the couple who live there and that they are away in Hawaii until the end of the week. He tells them he's in charge now and that the couple have changed their plans. According to him, there's "not supposed to be any right angles" and tells everyone to stop. He needs to talk to some people and tells them to go home and take the week off. He ends his little speech with "It's Miller time!" which made me laugh. But once again, I don't know if people in the '80s were really this stupid and gullible or this is just exaggerated for the plot of the movie. Maybe a little bit of both. Either way, he found a nice, free place to stay. 

He goes to the police station where he wants Rosewood and Taggart to show him the letters left from the Alphabet Bandit. Lutz wants to know who he is and in a Caribbean accent, Axel tells him his name is Johnny Wishbone and he's a psychic from St. Croix who's been sent here to help the Beverly Hills police with a crime they're having trouble with. I laughed when he said that Lutz and Biddle (the guy who's always following Lutz around) sounds like Kibble and Bits. It's funny because it's true! That had to be an improvised Eddie Murphy line. In fact, the whole scene felt like it was improvised!

Even though Rosewood and Taggart are supposed to be only doing traffic duty, Axel convinces them to help him find who shot Bogoil. He reminds them he was there for him a couple years ago and they agree as long as they can be covert and keep a low profile. (Ha! Good luck with that!) 

While he was at the station, Axel had taken a shell casing from one of the bullets that hit Bogomil and Taggart thinks they should go to the Beverly Hills Shooting Club and ask the owner, Russ Fielding, about it.

When they get to the exclusive, members-only club, we get another ridiculous scene where Axel takes a paper sack (filled with Rosewood's vitamins) and walks into the swanky reception area. He stops a waiter holding a bottle of champagne and while he's asking what year it is (the champagne, not the actual year!), he dips his hand in the ice and covers his face with water. The waiter answer his question but doesn't question what he's doing. Axel starts breathing heavily and walks carefully towards the desk where the receptionist is sitting. He tells her he's from "Metalux Explosive Research Company" and asks for Russell Fielding because he "ordered these plutonium-nitrate multi-explosive sound-seeking projectiles. The receptionist looks at her records and tells him she doesn't see anything about that and she can straighten this out, but before she can reach for the phone, he stops her and suggests she doesn't "use the phone, sneeze, cough, or anything." He slowly gets up to leave, telling her that she can work it out, but she tells him she can just take it to Mr. Fielding's office and tells him where it is. Uh, wouldn't you be calling the bomb squad if you really thought there were explosives in that bag? I don't know how believable that scene was, but it was amusing. 

Once he's out of her sight, he throws the bag away. I'm sure Rosewood will be thrilled about that. (He'll think that Axel sold them.) He goes into the shooting range room where he finds Russ and asks him about the bullet and he identifies it. The tall blonde woman who we know shot Bogomil is there and comes over and introduces herself as the assistant manager, Karla Fry (Brigitte Nielsen). In a private conversation, Russ tells Karla about the casing Axel brought to show him that was from there and that he made it and others just like it for Charles Cain, the manager of the Shooting Club. Karla goes into an office and tells this information to a man with a German accent. 

  

I need to do a quick fashion corner here and talk about Karla's earrings. They are the most '80s earrings I've ever seen. There are these huge, silver geometric-shaped earrings that cover almost the bottom third of her ear. They look very uncomfortable, not to mention ugly as hell. I posted a picture so you can see what I'm talking about.

While Axel is preoccupied with the shooting range (he gave a fake name to Russ and Karla), we are given some exposition. Charles Cain (played by Dean Stockwell; Al from Quantum Leap!) is called into the office of the German man to go over plans "C" and "D" because they "have promised to deliver Thomopolis $10 million Friday at 6." He wants to avoid the same mistakes they made on the Adriano job. The man wasn't happy that Cain supplied the men on that job with guns from his club, but Cain insisted nobody would be able to trade them and that nobody knows that he (the German) wrote the notes or planned all this. He questions why there is a man in the club asking questions and believes him to be a cop, because who else would be asking questions like those? He shows Cain Axel on the security footage and tells him he's going to kill him. Also, if you, like me, have no idea what the hell they're talking about, don't worry about; it really doesn't matter. This movie gets pretty convoluted and it's best not to ponder everything. 

Cain introduces himself to Axel and asks him if he would like a guest membership. Axel agrees and gives him the address where he can send it to after Cain asks for it. Uh, wouldn't you just fill it out there at the club? I get why he asked for it; after this scene we see Cain give the address to two hitmen in a car. I'm surprised Axel just gave out the address.

I have to laugh because in this scene Dean Stockwell has a cigar he occasionally smokes and he does this exact same thing in pretty much every episode of Quantum Leap. Maybe, like, it was in his contract he had to be smoking a cigar in all his projects. 

Back in the car where Rosewood and Taggart are waiting, Axel tells them a six-foot blonde woman was working in the club and Rosewood replies that a woman of the same description was spotted at the Adriano robbery. Taggart points out there are six foot blondes everywhere in the area. They decide to meet at Axel's "place" in an hour. 

Before he heads back, Axel makes a stop at Bogomil's house where he looks through his office and finds a newspaper clipping about oil price dropping and an ad for a club called 385 North. There's also a photograph of the German man with the name "Maxwell Dent" written in large red markers so the audience can see it. Jan is there too and Axel asks if she can use her connections of working at an insurance company to find out about this Maxwell Dent. 

 

When Taggart and Rosewood arrive at the address of the mansion Axel gave them and find him lounging in the pool, Taggart accuses him of stealing the house, but Axel insists it's his uncle's house. Funny, he's never mentioned having an uncle living in Beverly Hills before! That's what I would have pointed out! Taggart gets angry at him and tells him he needs to get out of the house. Hilariously, he ends up slipping on the concrete (which Axel had warned them was slippery) and falls into the pool. He ends up changing into a super preppy outfit that he finds upstairs: plaid pants white polo, yellow sweater vest, and light blue blazer. (I guess the man who lives in that house is the same size as Taggart!) He looks like he's about to go golfing. He's pretty pleased with himself and thinks he looks "sharp". 

They head out to 385 North, which happens to be a members-only strip club. Axel gets them in by telling the host that Taggart is former President Gerald Ford and he's his representative and Rosewood is his bodyguard. The host says he doesn't look like Ford and Axel asks him if he's ever seen him without his make-up. He convinces the guy it really is the ex-POTUS and adds that he should be proud to have him there and the host says it is a pleasure to have him there. 

Okay, so I looked up Ford's date of birth to see how old he would have been in '87 and the make-up line makes a lot of sense now. He was a lot older than I would have thought; in' 87 he turned 74! I looked up John Ashton's age and he turned 39 in '87, so I'm assuming Taggart is supposed to be the same age or around it. Personally, I think Taggart looks like Dr. Phil (but no accent!), but obviously, nobody knew who he was back then. 

Axel asks the bartender about a blond man named Nik Thomopolis who is seen schmoozing with a few people and finds out he owns the place. He asks his cop friends about him and Taggart tells him he's "the biggest arms dealer on the West Coast." Sidenote: Thompolis is played by Paul Guilfoyle who also played the bad guy in another movie from 1987, Three Men and a Baby. I guess he got sick of playing bad guys that he wanted to play someone who caught the bad guys in CSI:! 

Word must have gotten around that ex-President Ford was at the club because when they get up to leave, everyone else stands up and applauds. 

The two hitmen must have followed them to the club because as the three cops walk to their car, the men pull up to the curb and one of them takes out a gun and starts shooting. The cops dive for cover and start shooting back. The car ends up crashing into a pole and turns over, but the two guys manage to get away (not sure how it escalated so quickly!).

A furious Police Chief Hubbard shows up at the scene. He tells Axel that he checked with immigration and that "they never heard of a Johnny Wishbone." Axel comes clean (sort of) and shows him his badge and tells him he's a cop from Detroit and that he's in Beverly Hills because he's "attached to a multi-jurisdictional federal task force on organized crime and [his] code name is Wishbone." Hubbard just snaps back that he's the Chief of Police and he need to know about any federal task force. Axel tells him he can call his boss back in Detroit between the hours of 9 and 10, central time, and he'll tell him everything he needs to know. The fact that he gave only a one hour window to call his boss should have sent up red flags for Hubbard, but he never questions it. 

This will lead to a hilarious scene back in Detroit the next morning, where Jeffrey, having talked with Axel the night before, calls up Inspector Todd early in the morning pretending to be someone with the "FBI Enforcement Bulletin" (he disguises his voice) and he wants to interview him for some piece he's working on and asks if he can meet him at a diner for breakfast at nine o'clock. I'm surprised Todd said yes; if that had been me, I would have been super annoyed that a) somebody was calling me that early (I wouldn't have even answered the phone!), and b) why are they trying to set up an appointment without giving me that much notice? As soon as Todd leaves for his faux appointment (I hope for Jeffrey's sake, he gave him the address of a diner that's far away!), Jeffrey goes inside Todd's office (apparently he doesn't lock it when he's gone!) and wills the phone to ring. It does, eventually, in a few minutes, but what if Hubbard had waited until the end of the hour to call? By then, Todd would have been back and Axel's plan wouldn't have worked. As it is, by the time Hubbard does call, Todd has come back to the station, clearly pissed that he's been duped (I guess the diner wasn't that far away) and enters his office just as Jeffrey's hanging up the phone after confirming Axel's story with Hubbard. He had been hiding behind Todd's desk and when the Inspector demands to know what he's doing there, he exclaims "This is not my office!" which is a nice callback to the first movie with his "This is not my locker!" line. Paul Reiser was not in the third movie (I assume he was busy with Mad About You or maybe he saw the script and bailed, heh), but he's in the trailer for the new movie coming to Netflix and I hope they give him a similar line. 

Meanwhile back to Beverly Hills and the night before where Axel gets a match off a set of fingerprints he found on a matchbook that was in the car of the two goons who tried to off him. They get a match with Charles Cain and Axel recognizes him as the manager of the Shooting Club. He wants to go there and check it out even though it's 11 at night and closed. He manages to get them in with some MacGyver type maneuver using chewing gum, the foil from the gum, and a pocket knife. I'm not really sure what he did, but it certainly wouldn't work in real life! In Cain's office, they find map coordinates in his locked desk which he broke into. 

They find out the coordinates correlates with the City Deposit which is a federal Reserve Bank where banks take their money. Axel bets that's the next target. He's right and the Alphabet Bandit crosses off "C" and "D" in one fell swoop (does that really count as both, though? Seems like cheating to me, just saying). 

While it's being robbed the next day, the three cops drive there (quite recklessly), but come across construction that blocks their way. Axel and Rosewood are close enough to the bank that they can sound the alarm by shooting it and the bad guys escape and they follow them in a cement truck (yeah, it's just as ridiculous as it sounds) and we get a hilarious scene where Rosewood sideswipes a police car and tells Axel it's okay because he knows the guy and "he's a jerk!" Although, the next moment might have made me laugh more: we see a guy in his fancy car back out of his driveway, but when he sees the armored truck the bad guys are driving comes barreling down his street, he quickly retreats back to his driveway and when he thinks the coast is clear, he backs out again only to be sideswiped by the cement truck. I don't know, that just made me laugh...the guy is being so cautious, but his car ends up getting totaled anyway. 

They eventually spot the armored truck which is empty. Axel finds a $50 bill in the front seat and sees tracks in the dirt and realizes there was a pick-up vehicle. They follow the tracks and it leads them to the Playboy Mansion, of all places. The only really humorous moment during this whole scene is when they drive up in the cement truck and the valet is played by a very young Chris Rock. This would be three years before he was even on SNL! When he sees the cement truck, he says to Axel, "I get $10 for cars, I get $20 for limos. What the hell is this?" Axel gives him the fifty and tells him to put it next to a limo. 

There's a pool party (of course there is) and they somehow manage to make their way in by telling the receptionist (lol was there really a receptionist at the Playboy Mansion?) that they are there to clean the pool which doesn't make any sense since people are already using the pool, so you think they would have it cleaned before the party, but whatever. They just wanted an excuse to film at the Playboy Mansion. Out back, they see Karla, Maxwell Dent, and Thomopolis. Oh, and Hugh Hefner makes a cameo, because, of course he does. He still looks old even back in '87, but thats probably because he was 61. Axel tells Hugh that he wants to give him some information about some of his guests, such as that Thomopolis is "into guns and drugs" and "Max kills cops for a living." Hugh just tells them all to get out. He doesn't have time for this! 

So after that totally pointless scene (although the Chris Rock scene was pretty good, but I'm sure they could have found another small role for him), we find out that the bad guys are ready to set plan "E" in motion. 

Somehow, Axel had managed to pick pocket Dent's jacket and got a card with the information of his financial manager named Sidney Bernstein. He is played by Gilbert Gottfried and is doing his whole Gilbert Gottfried shtick. When the three cops enter his office while he's on the phone, he sarcastically says, "Oh, come on it. Don't let the fact that my door's closed dissuade you in any way from entering my office." Like Murphy, you can definitely tell when Gottfried is improvising! 

We next get this completely ridiculous (albeit hilarious) scene where Axel tells him they're with the Beverly Hills police and that he has 25 unpaid parking tickets and they're there to arrest him. Sidney tries to bribe them to drop the charges and Axel asks for $200 which Sidney is more than happy to part with. Now the most ludicrous moment: Axel asks Sidney if he can use his computer because he has "to wipe all evidence of this transaction out." He even asks him to leave to give him privacy and Sidney is all too eager to leave and let Axel use him computer. The hell? Shouldn't this be a huge red flag for Sidney? Surely he would realize that Axel was using his computer for other reasons because why would a police officer be using some random accountant's computer. It's so stupid, but whatever, the movie just wants you to know that Axel finds information that Dent and Kara are fleeing to Costa Rica soon.

He calls Jan to see what she found out about Dent and she tells him that he "was the cultural attache to the East Germany embassy in Honduras" and "he's got a racetrack, shooting club, drilling rig companies, and an oil company." He learns that Dent is in trouble because "he's let his insurance lapse on everything in the last six months." Tsk, tsk, tsk! Everything that is, except for the racetrack which he has a huge policy for. The racetrack is called Emperium Fields. Looks like we're knocking out the "F" too! 

The three cops reach the horse track, but by then it's too late and the money is gone. Cain has also been murdered (the audience sees Karla shoot him). Around this time, a press conference is being held by the police chief where he says he "is confident that [they] have identified the Alphabet bandit." He says it was Charles Cain because all the notes were signed "Carlos" and that's Spanish for Charles. Axel, Rosewood, and Taggart don't buy it. If the deceased Cain did it, then where is the money? A dead man can't make money disappear! Axel believes that Dent framed Cain for the first few crimes, then killed him on this one so he could get away because then the police would believe they had their man. (Spoiler alert: he's right.) He was buying guns from Thomopolis so he could sell them to his contacts in Central America. 

By this time, the movie is coming to an end and they are led to an oil field where they find trucks filled with explosives. The bad guys are there and there's a huge shootout. Axel kills Dent and Karla is about to kill Axel but Taggart comes to the rescue and shoots her. It was just a tiny bit misogynist when he utters, "Women" after he kills her. 

So the Alphabet Crimes have been solved and the mayor fires the Police Chief. We get one last funny scene with the the mayor calling Inspector Todd to thank him for lending Axel to their case and tells him his "extra tutelage" really paid off. Todd gets on the phone with Axel and exclaims, "Extra tutelage? What the f*** have you been telling them?" 

Just as Axel is leaving the mansion he's been staying in, the couple comes back. I bet that construction company is going to get chewed out for not working on their house at all while they were gone! 

While this movie has some funny moments, I like the first one better. This one has a few scenes that don't seem that necessary. There's a weird subplot with Billy where he's obsessed with guns, knifes and other weapons. Axel and Taggart keep telling him, "We need to talk." This really doesn't fit with his character from the first movie. That being said, the second movie is much better than the atrocious Beverly Hills Cop 3. 

I can't think of one scene in the third movie where Eddie Murphy improvises his lines as I don't think he ever does! He plays Axel way more seriously and it feels like he's trying to be a dramatic actor in a comedy! (And the funny scenes aren't even that funny.) The tone is so odd. The movie was panned and there wouldn't be another Beverly Hills Cop movie for another thirty years! I'll probably yada-yada through most of this as there's a lot of nada-nada here. 

Once again, we begin in Detroit where Axel has organized a raid to stop a car thief ring at a chop stop. Before that happens, the audience sees the criminal mechanics in the garage working on cars. The radio is on and "Come See About Me" by Diana Ross starts playing and they're all bopping their heads to the music, which, I can't blame them because it is a catchy song. But then we get an absolutely ridiculous moment when these two fat guys stop what they're doing to get up and DANCE. They're singing into a fake mic and have a whole routine and everything...wtf is going on? One guy even does a cartwheel in front of the other guy who asks him, "What are you doing?" Uh, you're one to talk! You're also part of this song-and-dance routine! 

The garage door opens and a car comes in and a guy in a suit gets out of the back seat. You can tell he's going to be the Big Bad of the movie. He asks the two fat guys if they had any trouble with the hi-jack and we see a truck that's filled with boxes that says "Property of U.S. Government." The bad guy pumps his fist and gives a comical "Yes!" like he's an eight-year-old who scored a goal in his soccer game. 

 

The fat guys were promised a payment and I knew they were going to get killed instead of paid and I was right. In fact, all the mechanics are gunned down. The crazy thing is "Come See About Me" is still playing when they're shot! This song is a little under three minutes. Just think: one minute you're dancing to Diana Ross; the next you're dead. 

Axel and his team have been given intel that the guys at the chop shop don't have guns, which is probably true, but unbeknownst to them, they're all dead by the time they plan to do their raid. Axel knocks on the door and the bad guy tells one of his cronies to shoot whoever's on the other end. Instead of opening the door and just shooting Axel, he lets Axel, who's pretending he wants to sell car parts, ramble on, until finally, Axel is able to overtake him when the bad guy takes out his gun. 

Long story short, there's a bunch of shooting. Inspector Todd, Axel's beloved boss, ends up getting shot and dies, which I hated, but I guess you need a reason for him to go after the bad guy. It just sucks that this awesome character was killed off by such a dud of a villian. Axel is chasing the bad guy (we'll learn his name later) after he gets away in the truck, but he is intercepted by a man who introduces himself as Steve Fulbright (Stephen McHattie) from the FBI and tells Axel that he got himself in the middle of an investigation and it's important that this man "not be apprehended at this time" because they want to know "where he's going and what he's got and who he's selling it to." 

Back in the chop shop, towels with "Wonder World" printed on them are found. That's a theme park near Beverly Hills and Axel believes he needs to head back to the Hills to find Todd's killer. 

They play the theme song for the first time and it sound different from the other two movies. I did some research and found out that Harold Faltemeyer, who composed the theme song, did not come back for this movie so it's performed by somebody else and it's in the "breakbeat hardcore" version, whatever that is (I just read it on Wikipedia), but all I know it sounds different and the original is better! 

Axel goes sees Rosewood who has been promoted to DDO-JSIOC, which stands for Deputy Director of Operations for Joint Systems Interdepartmental Operational Command. Terrible title! We find out that Taggart has retired to Phoenix. Now, he would have only been in his early fifties, so its seems kind of early for him to retire, but hey, good for him. At first, I just assumed John Ashton read the script and didn't want anything to do with it, but I read that he and Ronny Cox (guy who played Bogomil) had other projects they were working on. Mmm, are we sure about that? 

Another cop has replaced Taggart. Hector Elizondo plays Detective Jon Flint and when I saw him, I jokingly thought to myself, did Garry Marshall direct this movie? (The credits don't roll until the end of the movie so I had no idea who directed it, even though, yes, I realize I could have easily just looked it up.) You can tell that the writers wrote this role with Taggart in mind and they didn't even change many, if any of his lines. There are a few scene where we see Flint in his cop car and he gets a message that things are going haywire at Wonder World and he says "Axel!" like he knows Axel personally and he literally just met the guy only a few hours ago. It's so weird. 

Anyway, Axel tells him why he's come back to Beverly Hills and explains about the towels from Wonder World and that he's going to check out the theme park. Flint tells him he should talk to Ellis De Wald (Timothy Carhart) who is head of park security and "runs the biggest private security force in America." 

When Axel enters Wonder World, he is watched closely by two security guards. I get the feeling "Wonder World" was a placeholder name until they could come up with something a little better (and not so generic) and either they forgot to change the name of they just couldn't think of anything a little more clever. Seriously, who ever came up with the name "Wonder World" has no creativity. 

Axel sees employees entering through a fake tree with a door and he is able to just walk in. You think this door would have a keypad or a swipe code for employees only, but nope, he is able to open the door and walk right in! It leads downstairs where some of the rides are controlled, including one called Alien Attack. There he meets a woman named Janice who doesn't really question who he is or why he's down there. She becomes his love interest...I guess? There's some cringe-y flirting that happens between them and while he does ask her out, we never see them on a date (maybe that's a good thing) and he never kisses her at the end of the movie. He had more chemistry with Jenny from the first movie and they weren't even in a romantic relationship, although they had great banter, but maybe that's because they've been friends for a long time. 

Well, wouldn't you know it...De Wald happens to be the bad guy who shot Todd and Axel is after! Whaaaaa-? Both Flint and Rosewood think he must have the wrong guy or the killer he's after has a striking resemble to De Wald, but Axel is positive it's him. 

Back at his hotel, Janice and Uncle Dave (he's the Walt Disney of Wonder World) tell him that that Roger Fry, the park's chief operating officer, disappeared two weeks ago. He designed the whole park and knows it like the back of his hand. Dave shows Axel a note that Roger left that just says "This is important life and death", but other than that they don't have any information about why or how he disappeared. Axel thinks he must have found something someone didn't want him to find (spoiler alert: he's right).

Serge has come back (Perfect Stangers ended the year before) and we get a funny, though ultimately unnecessary scene with him. Axel and Billy come across him at some convention and he has a "Survival Boutique" booth. I cracked up when he exclaims "Ack-well!" and "Beeeeee-lieeee" and asks Billy if he remembers the espresso he made him with a lemon twits. He tells them that the art gallery has gone bankrupt. I'm surprised he didn't say anything about Jenny or that Axel didn't ask about her. Serge tells them he's selling survival items that "must conform to the 3 P's: protection, prestige, and pretty." He shows them his best-seller, a clunky-looking "gun" called the Annihilator 2000 that doesn't look like any of the adjectives he mentioned. This weapon looks like the most impractical thing ever: its equipped with a phone, microwave, CD player, radio, night vision goggles, verbal alarm system, and video camera among other thing. Did I mention it's huge and clunky and it certainly ain't pretty! 

Axel keeps harassing De Wald, but doesn't have any evidence he's behind Todd's killing. The FBI agent, Fulbright (I guess he has come to California too), reminds Axel to stop messing with his investigation because they "want him doing business as usual." He gives him a first class plane ticket back to Detroit, but we know Axel is lying when he tells Fulbright he'll be on that plane. 

Janice shows Axel the schematics of the park and he enters through a vent and above he spies on De Wald and his men creating counterfeit money. I laughed when they were only printing $1 bills. You'd think they'd print something with more value! He is literally standing above them not even attempting to hide and of course De Wald sees him and the bad guys go after him, but he gets away and calls Fulbright from a payphone in the park to tell him what's going on. 

The bad guys are able to to find him because of the security cameras and soon they have him surrounded. In a move I didn't quite understand, he takes out his gun (how the hell was he allowed in with a gun...oh, never mind) and shoots it in the air, then lies it on the ground. Why would he do that with all these people around him, not to mention many children? I didn't quite get that. They had him surrounded and they were going to apprehend him, regardless. They bring him to the underground offices and Fulbright comes in, wondering why he's not in Detroit. Axel tells him he knows what he's investigating and goes to show him the room where he found the counterfeit money. Only the money that's being printed is fake play money called Wonder World dollars. Apparently it's easy to change the setting! 

Later, Axel meets up with Uncle Dave (on the side of a street) and wants to know about the guy who disappeared. He takes another look at the note and realizes that it was written on the paper that the fake money is being printed on and it has a barcode or something to prove that it's being used for the counterfeit money. IDK, but now he has proof that counterfeit money is being made and as he says that, here comes De Wald and some of his goons. They had followed Uncle Dave and De Wald shoots him. Axel manages to get away and drive Uncle Dave to a hospital where he will survive. We never do find out what happened to the guy who disappeared. I mean, obviously they killed him, but we never found out what they did with the body. I guess the point of that storyline was that the note was written on the fake money paper. 

Anyway, yada, yada, yada, Axel ends up back at the underground offices of the park because De Wald has told him to come with the mint paper or he'll kill Janice, who he has hostage. On the way there he stops to get the Annihilator 2000 from Serge. Rosewood and Flint find out he's headed to Wonder World (damn it, I always want to write "Wally World" instead!) and head there too. 

 

Axel refuses to give De Wald the paper, there's a lot of fighting, yada, yada, yada, Billy and Janice end up trapped behind a glass door that protects something when there's a fire...IDK, who cares...Axel gets away, there's more fighting and gun shooting, yada, yada, yada. 

We will get a scene of Axel using the Annihilator 2000 against a couple of goons and at first it shoots out a net, then plays rap music, then old-timey music until it finally sprays bullets the men. Then yada, yada, yada, more bad guys are killed in the alien space ride we saw from before, we see that the trapped Billy and Janice get out and Flint has arrived. I can't remember who it was, being either Billy or Flint shoots a bad guy who falls out of the chairlift ride. Like, this amusement park has now officially become a crime scene. For some reason the annoying "Wonder World" song (think "It's a Small World After All") is playing on a loop and Flint screams (to nobody because everybody around him is dead), "Turn that f***ing song off!" I think that was the only part of this scene I laughed at. 

Finally, Axel eventually kills De Wald in some dinosaur ride and here comes Fulbright asking if he's okay. Earlier, I had thought either he or Flint is a bad guy disguised as a good guy and as soon as he points his gun at Axel, I had a good hunch it was him! Luckily, Flint shows up ad Axel is able to take a surprised Fulbright and kill him with his gun. 

There's a super weird scene where Rosewood walks in, all bloodied on one side and walking funny and asks if they're okay before collapsing. They just start laughing, saying he needs medical attention. Not sure why they're laughing when their friend looks like he's knocking on death's door!

But it's okay because everyone is okay and in the last scene we see Uncle Dave dedicating a new Wonder World character to Axel, a fox named Axel Fox. Why the hell would they want to remember this day of bloodshed? Anyway, thank God the movie is finally over. 

If you want to see Judge Reinhold in a better ' 94 movie, see The Santa Clause (and it's not even like I'm a fan of that movie, but it's better than this one!); if you want to see Hector Elizondo in a better movie that takes place in Beverly Hills, see Pretty Woman; if you want to see a better Beverly Hills Cop movie, see the first, second, or upcoming one on Netflix. Yes, the one on Netflix hasn't been released yet, but I'm confident it will be better than this one! I'm pretty sure they learned from their mistakes of this one! 

Unbreakable//Split//Glass

Disclaimer: I will be spoiling the following three movies. These are M. Night Shyamalan films, so obviously they have twists, cuz, you know, that's his thing! Perhaps it's a spoiler that I'm reviewing these movies together if you didn't already know they were connected, but it has been over a year since the last movie came out so I figured everybody already knew about that. 

Unbreakable

Director: M. Night Shyamalan

Cast: Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, Robin Wright, Spencer Treat Clark, Charlayne Woodard

Released: November 22, 2000

Viewed in theaters: November 23, 2000

Split
Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Cast: James McAvoy, Anya Taylor-Joy, Betty Buckley,  Brad William Henke
Released: January 20, 2017

Glass
Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Cast: James McAvoy, Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, Sarah Paulson, Anya Taylor-Joy, Spencer Treat Clark, Charlayne Woodard

Released: January 18, 2019

So who knew M. Night Shyamalan directed a trilogy? I didn't until Glass came out and I heard it was Bruce Willis and Sam Jackson reuniting as their characters from Unbreakable (nineteen years later!) I also knew that James McAvoy's character(s!) from Split was in it, but I didn't realize there was an Unbreakable connection in Split; rather I just assumed Shyamalan thought that character would work well with the Glass storyline; but as we find out, there is a connection between all three movies.

In Unbreakable, we are introduced to a seemingly average man named David Dunn (Bruce Willis) who lives with his wife, Audrey (Robin Wright) and tween son, Joseph (Spencer Treat Clark) in Philadelphia where he works as a security guard at a stadium. However, we soon learn that David is not that average as he is the only survivor of a train derailment. Not only did he survive it, but he didn't even break his bones or get a scratch on him. The way the scene is shot where the doctor (played by Michael Kelly) is telling David all of this is very Shyamlanian. It reminded me of the famous "I see dead people" scene in The Sixth Sense (just no iconic lines!)

Not surprisingly, his story makes the news and one man in particular is intrigued by David. He is Elijah Price (Samuel L. Jackson) who has a genetic disorder called osteogenesis imperfecta which means his bones are very low in density and are easily broken. He mentions he's broken fifty-four bones in his life, but during a scene in Glass, he will mention he's had ninety-four breaks in his life, so that means he's broken bones forty more times in the nineteen years (or seventeen years....I'm a little confused by the timeline, but I'll explain why later) since the year 2000. Despite all the breaks, he has Type 1, which is the "tamest" version. There are four types and Type 4 is the most severe and, therefore, most deadly.

Elijah owns a comic book art gallery called Limited Edition and writes a note to David on his business card asking him, "How many days of your life have you been sick?" David finds the note under his windshield wiper and he and Joseph visit Elijah at his store. David can't remember the last time he was sick, but figures there must have been a point sometime in his life he's been ill. Maybe the guy gets flu shots. I get flu shots every year and I've been really lucky that I never get really sick where I just want to stay in bed and sleep all day because I'm so miserable. Sure, I have days I may feel sluggish, but nothing severe or anything. The last time I was really sick, like had to call in to work because I was legitimately contagious and go to a doctor was in 2014.


Elijah, being a comic book nerd, proposes the theory that if there's somebody like him in the world who can easily have his bones broken, then maybe there's an opposite of him in the world, somebody who never gets sick and whose bones never break. David tells him that as a child he did almost drown so he did have a near death experience, but Elijah believes that means that water is his kryptonite (just like with the aliens in Signs...oops, hope I didn't spoil that for anyone!) I have to say this movie is ahead of its time as you see Sam Jackson in a comic book store where there are a lot of Marvel comics and posters and cutouts of Avengers characters (I remember seeing one of Spider-Man).

We see Elijah's love for comic books started when he was a child when his mother (Charlayne Woodard) gives him a comic book titled The Battle with Jugaro and tells him, "They say this one has a surprise ending" (haha, Shyamalan, I see what you did there). It is a little messed up how she makes him get the comic book, though. She has it wrapped in a box that's sitting on a bench in the park that's across the street from their apartment where they can see it from their window. She wants to make him work for it to prove he can do anything despite having brittle bone disease. There are a lot of kids playing on the playground and one kid literally runs right in front of the bench with the present that has a big shiny bow on it. I am really surprised no one took it. If this happened in the real world, no way that gift is staying there longer than five minutes! Perhaps he also took a penchant to comic books because kids called him "Mr. Glass" because he breaks like glass and if that doesn't sound like a :::coughcough::: villain from a comic book, I don't know what does.

Joseph tries to test a few theories that his dad may be a superhero. When David is lifting weights in their basement, he asks Joseph to remove a few of them and after he lifts them again, he asks his son how much weight he removed and Joseph tells him he added more. They both want to see how much more he can lift and after using 350 pounds of weights, they add two (full) paint cans to each side. Now that he has proven his dad has super strength, he also wants to prove that he's invincible so in a very tense scene, Joseph, who has found his dad's gun, has it pointed at David and plans to shoot him to prove to him that nothing will happen to him. Both of his parents are rightfully freaking out and telling him to put down the gun. I had to laugh a little when he said "I'll only shoot once." David threatens to leave if Joseph shoots him. So either Joseph shoots and kills him and loses him forever or Joseph shoots and injures him and David leaves. Joseph is hurt by this and says he thought they were friends to which David replies, "Friends don't shoot each other." True dat! To Joseph's parents' relief, he puts the gun down.

Elijah pays David a visit at the university stadium where he works. As they're both standing next to a line of people waiting to get into the stadium, David points out a man to Elijah who thinks may have a weapon because he's wearing a large coat. He says it's just an intuition, but in a scene earlier we saw David brush up against the man and this is how he knows the man is dangerous. Well, he doesn't know he has this ability yet. Of course, the dude just looks straight up shady so I don't think you need to have any premonitions that he has a weapon. As David correctly predicts, the man turns and leaves the line once he sees David start patting down random people. Elijah follows the man down the subway stairs to see if David was right about him. The guy is walking too fast for him and as Elijah is trying to keep up with him, he slips and takes a nasty fall down the stairs and I'm just like, OUCH. For some reason, his cane is made of glass (terrible idea) and just shatters everywhere. Yeah, it looks cool in the movie, but don't use a cane made out of glass. Just not a good idea.

When David realizes he has a gift of being able to see the past crimes of people who he comes in physical contact with, he decides to hang out at the train station where he comes in contact with a whole bunch of folks who have done some terrible, terrible things. It seems every time he comes in contact with someone, the crimes they've committed just get worse and worse. We see a woman who has stolen expensive jewelry, then we see a man who has raped a passed out woman, then we see a janitor who broke into a home and killed the father. Writes note to self: never go to the Philly train station. In this scenario, the wife and two daughters are bound and gagged in their own home and David goes to rescue them. I didn't really understand why this janitor/home intruder/evil man was doing what he was doing: did he have a history with this family? Was he there to steal something and wanted the people out of his way? Obviously for the movie they needed David to be a hero because after he rescues the two girls (the wife does not make it) a sketch of him in his now trademark green poncho is in the paper and when he shows it to Joseph, he immediately knows it's his father and now knows what he knew all along: that his father is a superhero.

So as with any M. Night Shyamalan movie, you know there is a twist coming up. It had been nearly two decades since I last saw the movie and while I remembered the comic book aspect of the movie, I couldn't remember what exactly the twist was. When I re-watched it again, I was like, Wait, that's the twist? That's not a twist. That's so obvious! Maybe back in 2000 it would have been considered a big reveal. David shakes Elijah's hand and we see that Elijah has been involved in some terroristic events including starting a fire at an apartment building, a plane crash, and the very train crash that David survived. We see a security video of him leaving the unattended and unlocked front car of the train. Um, no way this would be plausible post 9/11! Good thing this movie came out a year before when security was a lot more lax! Elijah tells David, "We are connected, you and I" and that he had to make "so many sacrifices" just to find him. He did all these horrific acts because he needed to find the one person out there who was his antithesis and to do this he had to kill a lot of people along the way to find the one person who he wasn't able to kill. Yikes! 

You know when you're watching a movie based on a true event and there's usually text on the screen giving you an update on where these people are now? Well, that happens in this movie which makes it super cheesy, especially since this is not based on true events (duh). Why don't we see a scene of Elijah at an institution for the criminally insane instead of being told it with text on the screen? Just feels super unnecessary to me.

So now we jump sixteen years ahead to the next movie. The way Split begins is a little contrived. We need three girls -two of who are very close friends and one an outsider - to be in the same place at the same time. Claire is having a birthday party at a restaurant and invites everyone from her class, including Casey (Anya Taylor-Joy), the weird loner girl who has no friends. At the end of the party, Casey's ride is late and she tells Claire's father she can take the bus home, but he insists on driving her home along with Marcia, Claire's best friend.


The movie starts immediately once Claire's father is incapacitated offscreen by a man (James McAvoy) who gets in the car. Claire and Marcia are in the back, talking and don't realize the man in the driver's seat is not Claire's dad until a full minute in. Casey, is too scared to say anything and is wondering if she should bolt. When Claire confronts the man, telling him he's in the wrong car, he sprays them with something to make them unconscious and the three of them wake up in some cellar-type room. They can peep through a keyhole where they see another room with a locked door, so they know escaping isn't going to be easy. When they hear a woman's voice talking to the man and see someone wearing a skirt and high heels through the keyhole, they start yelling to be rescued. They are all shocked when it is revealed it is their captor talking in that voice and wearing the skirt and high heels. They just stare at him (her) in disbelief when he (she) tells them: "Don't worry, I'll talk to him. He listens to me. He's not well."

It doesn't take long before they realize they are being held captive by someone with DID - dissociative identity disorder, probably more well known as having multiple personalities. I imagine this has to be a dream come true for an actor to play. James McAvoy plays a character with 23 - soon to be 24 - identities. I believe he only plays eight of them in this movie, but we will see even more of these personalities in the next movie. Aside from the big one we will see at the end, there are really only four personalties that get to come "out into the light". These include a nine-year-old boy named Hedwig who loves rap music and dancing and saying "etcetera" at the end of his sentences; a religious woman named Patricia who has a slight Scottish accent (might as well since McAvoy is Scottish); Dennis, who is the one who kidnapped the girls and always wants to make sure everything is clean and makes the girls take off their clothes if they get dirty (plus he's kind of a perv...); and Barry who is into fashion and is usually the one who contacts and talks to their therapist, Dr. Fletcher (Betty Buckley) who is an expert in DID.  Not only do they each have their own wardrobe, McAvoy gives them each their own distinct personality in the way he talks, his mannerisms, and the way he carries himself. It is very impressive acting.

I don't know much about DID - in fact, I didn't even know it was referred to as DID; I just always called it multiple personalities - but there is something fascinating and creepy about it. It's just unfathomable that someone can have a completely different personality from their own, or several, as is the case here. I assume doctors have ways of diagnosing it and being able to tell a person really has DID instead of just pretending to. We see a scene of Dr. Fletcher giving a seminar where she says there are moments when two identities can take "the light", or the conscience at the same time and talks about a time when it happened with somebody she was working with who was taking notes at the same time with both hands and each hand was writing something different with a different handwriting. The different identities in Split are able to communicate with each other, as when the girls heard Dennis and Patricia talking to each other. There's also a scene towards the end of the film when McAvoy is looking into a mirror and all the personalties are communicating with each other and the camera pans from McAvoy to his reflection. It's very reminiscent of the Gollum/Smeagol scene in The Two Towers.

I'm sure Hollywood movies and shows about DID over exaggerates it greatly and I'm sure Split is no different. I read that people with DID were most likely abused as children or suffered some great trauma as a child which is what we see happen to Kevin Crumb, who is the person played by McAvoy with all the personalties. While we don't get too much of his backstory, we see flashbacks of his mother getting furious with him for not cleaning his room and coming after him with a hot iron in her hand. He most likely created all these personalities as a coping mechanism. Dennis, the personality who is a neat freak, was one of the first to appear and he protected Kevin by making sure everything was clean because if anything was dirty, it would set his mom off. We'll explore more about his parents in the next movie, but I still have a lot of questions.

The two non-entity girls (don't get too attached to them) think if all three of them take him on at once, they can fight him and escape, but Casey doesn't agree to the idea because she knows it won't work. The girls really want to escape because they were told by Dennis that they are "sacred food" and one of the girls think he has a dog he wants to feed them to. She's not totally off-base. When they get a clue from Hedwig that there may be a way out, Claire finds a way through the ceiling and ends up running through a long hallway and in a locker room. I was very confused where they were until it's revealed at the end (I guess what was a bit of a twist too). Dennis fixes the ceiling and keeps all the girls separated, especially after Marcia also tries to escape when Patricia is making a sandwich for her and Casey and she hits Patricia with a chair, but since the door is locked, she doesn't get too far.

Casey has formed somewhat of a bond with Hedwig, the personality who is stuck at the age of nine. After Hedwig mentions he likes to dance to music in his room and has a CD player next to his window, she gets him to trust her by telling him that she gets in trouble at school on purpose so she can get away from everyone and be alone. We see flashbacks of her as a young girl who would often go on hunting trips with her dad and uncle (Brad William Henke). Through each of these flashbacks we learn something about her backstory each time, like the fact that her uncle started sexually abusing her at a very young age and that he is currently her guardian because her father had a heart attack when she was still quite young. Casey doesn't share all of that with Hedwig, but with what she does tell him, he sneaks her into his room and starts dancing to Kanye West. Watching a man in his late 30s dancing to rap music while pretending to be a nine-year-old is both super weird and oddly endearing at the same time. However, Casey can't appreciate his dancing because all she sees is the CD player by a drawing of a window on the wall. There are no actual windows to be found. When she asks Hedwig about this, he gets mad and accuses her of trying to escape. He shows her a Walkie-Talkie that one of the other personalties stole from someone and she takes it and when she finds out she can get in communication with someone on another line she tells them who she is and that she's been abducted. The person thinks she is joking and pretending to be someone else. Hedwig becomes Dennis and is strong enough to overpower her and take the Walkie-Talkie. I thought there was going to be a payoff with this scene later on, but there never was.

Dr. Fletcher knows that Kevin has twenty-three personalties and knows all of them quite well. She usually talks to Barry, who used to be the dominant personality until Dennis and Patricia started taking over and limiting Barry's time in the light. (Not really quite sure how it all works). Barry told Dr. Fletcher about the other personalties and when Dennis is talking to her, pretending to be Barry, she knows it is not him and correctly guesses that she's really talking to Dennis. She also knows the only way to talk to Kevin is to say his full name, but she doesn't want to do that because it would be chaos for the other identities and she doesn't want to hurt them. She is dismissive that Dennis insists that there is a twenty-fourth personality getting ready to emerge. When she receives many urgent e-mails from Barry she visits his place and this is when she discovers the three girls. He turns into the Beast, which is this animalistic being who becomes very large in stature and has thick skin (literally) and can crawl up walls and all these unnatural traits that no human should have. Before he crushes the doctor to death, she has written a note with his name on it, with the instructions, "Say his name." The two non-entity girls are trying to escape by trying to hook a wire hanger and catching a slide bolt and the movie almost makes you think they're going to escape, but no. They are chow for the beast. Dennis had kidnapped the girls as an offering to the Beast who apparently will only eat the "impure young". But, hey, if anyone was wondering, at least Claire's dad turned out to be okay.

Now Casey is the only one left alive and running for her life from the Beast. She finds the paper from Dr. Fletcher and screams, "Kevin Wendell Crumb" and the man that is the host body for all these personalties appears and is very confused. He asks Casey if it is September 18, 2014, as that is the last day he remembers. When he realizes he's done terrible things, he tells her where his gun and bullets are and instructs her to kill him. That would be utterly terrifying to realize you haven't been yourself in over two years; it would be like be in a walking coma. The other personalties start to come out and once again the Beast emerges. By that time, Casey has found the gun and bullets and has barricaded herself into a cage, but the Beast easily bends the bars after Casey has shot him, but the bullets just ricochet off him. When the Beast sees cut marks on Casey's body, he realizes that she has been hurt just like he has in the past and runs off, sparing her life.

She is rescued by someone who finds her and helps her. This is when it is revealed that she was at an old building at the zoo the whole time where Kevin worked. I thought maybe this was the big twist and while it was a surprise, it wasn't THE twist. We see her in a cop car and when the (female) cop tells her that her uncle is there to pick her up, Casey just looks at her and you know she's going to tell her about her uncle. She does because in the next movie she's living with a foster family and mentions her uncle is in jail.

Okay, now for the big twist. Hot take: Split has the best Shyamalan twist. If only because you didn't see it coming at all (as long as you weren't spoiled!) I've already put my spoiler disclaimer at the top. So obviously I knew about the Unbreakable connection so the big reveal at the end wasn't a big shock to me, but it was something I wasn't expecting to see, because, as I mentioned earlier, I assumed Shyamalan made Unbreakable, then sixteen years later makes Split as a totally different entity, then makes Glass as a sequel to Unbreakable and decided he could incorporate the Split characters into that one. It would have been super fun to watch the movie in the theater and see that reveal without being spoiled. I have to wonder if I would have even gotten it. I think I would have, but not right away. First we hear the music the was prominent in Unbreakable, which I definitely wouldn't have remembered. As I literally saw Unbreakable a few days before I watched Split, I instantly recognized it. Then we see Bruce Willis sitting at the end of the diner wearing a uniform with his character's name on it. I know I wouldn't have recognized his character's name, but being that he's only been in two (at the time) Shyamalan films, it pretty much narrows it down to Unbreakable, well, because, you know. And the woman next to him acknowledges him so she can see/hear him, ha! On the news, they are talking about Kevin and mention he is being referred to as "The Horde" because of his multiple personalties. When the woman mentions how he reminds her of "that crazy guy in the wheel chair that they put away 15 years ago" and is trying to remember his name, Bruce Willis is revealed as he says "Mr. Glass." I bet audiences (the ones old enough to remember Unbreakable!) were freaking out when they realized this movie had a connection to Unbreakable and there would undoubtedly be a sequel. Pretty cool.

This takes us to Glass. I'm a little confused by the timeline because it is mentioned that Casey's classmates were killed only three weeks ago, but it is also mentioned that the events of Unbreakable happened nineteen years ago, which would be "real" time. (Although, technically, it really should have been eighteen years since Unbreakable came out in very late 2000 and Glass opened the first month of 2019...but who's paying attention to minute details like that?) So does that mean that Split took place in 2019 as well? Then why does the woman at the end of the movie mention Mr. Glass being put away 15 years ago? Ahh, who really cares that much, right? I guess Shyamalan just didn't catch that. He did catch something else that made me laugh just because it really wasn't that important. So you know how he always has a cameo in all his films, like he was the doctor in The Sixth Sense? In Unbreakable he plays one of the people who David comes into contact with at the stadium and it is revealed he is a drug dealer and/or user. In Split he plays a security guard who works at the building where Dr. Fletcher lived and she uses his help to track Kevin. In Glass, David owns a home security store (his cover when he's not fighting crime) and Shyamalan as the security guard is seen purchasing some extra cameras for the building. He is obviously the same character he was in Split, but then he asks David if he used to work at the football stadium and when David confirmed he did, Shyamalan's character is like, "Oh, I thought I recognized you. I used to hang out there with a bunch of shady people when I was younger, then I turned my life around." Okay, first of all, you KNOW someone tweeted @MNightShyamalan right after they saw Split and asked him if that was supposed to be the same character from Unbreakable and Shyamalan figured he better make that clear in Glass, so he threw that throwaway line in. Second of all, how the hell would he remember a security guard at a crowded stadium from nineteen (or fifteen depending on what timeline you're going on) years ago?? I call B.S.! Nonetheless, it was a super amusing scene.

Since Elijah goes by Mr. Glass and Kevin now goes by The Horde, David also has his own superhero name and he is referred to as The Overseer. His son, now grown, is the only one who still knows his father's true identity and helps him track the Horde where he now has four cheerleaders held hostage in an abandoned factory.

I heard an interview Spencer Treat Clark gave on a movie review podcast and he said after some of his friends saw Split, they were telling him he had to see it and he just assumed it was because he worked with Shyamalan in his youth; he had no idea about the Unbreakable connection until he saw it. Luckily for Shyamalan he was still acting as a young adult, but I wonder if he still would have taken the role if he retired as a child actor? Obviously Bruce Willis and Sam Jackson are back, too (well, duh, the movie IS called Glass) and so is Charlayne Woodward in old age make-up as Elijah's mother. The only person from the original movie who isn't back is Robin Wright as Audrey David's wife. She is mentioned as having died from leukemia five years ago. It's possible that they tried to get her, but she had other projects that didn't allow her, but honestly, they didn't really need her.

David is able to find The Horde and rescue the four girls before the Beast is about to maim them. While doing this, he was tracked by Dr. Ellie Staple (Sarah Paulson) who apprehends both of them (with the help of some armed men) and takes them to Raven Hill Memorial Mental Institution for psychiatric treatment. She tells the two men, who are kept in separate rooms that she specializes in a "particular type of delusions of grandeur: those who believe they are superheroes." David is kept in a room where the walls are equipped with 46 high pressured nozzles which are all connected to a 15,000 gallon water tank right outside which will only be triggered if he tries to escape and Kevin is kept in a room that has strobe lights that go off and change his personalties if he gets too close to the door and ends up confusing him. If Dr. Staple is telling them they're not really who they think they are, then why do they need all these safety precautions to make sure they don't escape?

 The same main alter egos that we saw in Split - Dennis, Patricia, Hedwig, the Beast - are mainly used in this one, but we do see even more of Kevin's other personalties in this movie, especially with the use of the strobe lights. These include a Spanish-speaking woman and probably my favorite, a man who specializes in Japanese cinema from the 1950s-80s. Can you get any more specific than that?

The big scene in the movie is when David, Elijah, and Kevin are all together in the same room, but it was a bit of a disappointment because the characters don't interact with each other, rather they are speaking with Dr. Staple. Well, not Elijah as he doesn't speak until an hour into the movie. David had an MRI taken and Dr. Staple tells him that his front lobe has a "questionable cloud" and that it could mean it's damage from the train accident. She seems to have an explanation for everything that could prove these men are akin to comic book characters. She tells Kevin (well, he wasn't technically Kevin, but I forget which personality he was in this scene...) that he probably learned how to rock climb through videos. When he challenges her and asks how the Beast was able to pull apart the iron bars on the cage she tells him due to the cage's old age, she was able to pull them apart by putting a wrench between them and leaning back and said it was, "difficult, but possible" (yeah, but the Beast didn't use a wrench!) and when he challenges her even further and asks how the Beast survived being hit by bullets, she tells him the gun and bullets were old and the cartridges were compromised from the moisture in the room.

So, yada, yada, yada, we learn that Elijah has been pretending to be catatonic this whole time and his first line of dialogue comes about an hour into the movie when he sneaks out of his room and into Kevin's room where he talks to a few of his personalties and wants to meet the Beast as he has big plans. Earlier in the film we had seen him looking at a local magazine with a picture of a gaudy building called the Osaka Tower, claiming to be the tallest building in Philadelphia. The headline read "The Osaka Tower - A True Marvel" which is obviously a nod to the comic book franchise, though there is obviously a nod to Die Hard and the Nakatomi Plaza, and you know, Bruce Willis.

He tells David that they are going to Osaka Tower where the Horde will be revealed. There are three floors that house a chemical company and Glass is planning to blow up the building with those chemicals. Well, he certainly is telling the right person about this because if there's anyone who can stop a terrorist at a skyscraper, it's John McClane! The movie takes a bit of a detour when the characters never actually go to Osaka Tower, which turned out to be a red herring, and instead have their big showdown in the parking lot of the hospital.

During this time, the Beast has been somewhat of a sidekick for Glass, killing anyone who might get in their way and treating him like a God. However, when Joseph lets it drop that Kevin's father was on Eastrail #177, the exact same train that was derailed because of Mr. Glass and everyone died except for David Dunn, the Beast quickly turns on him. Yes, that's right. It all ties together. So apparently there's a scene in Split where one of Kevin's personalties (again, I can't remember who) is at the train station where he buys flowers and places them on the track in remembrance of his dad. While I remember this scene, I just never made the connection. Now it's like, duh.

So we get a few more details about Kevin's upbringing, but I'm still confused. When we see Kevin's dad on the train, he is reading a book about DID therapy and treatment and it is mentioned he was on his way to see a doctor. A couple questions: first of all, why is he leaving his son with his wife (I assume they were still married, but I don't know for sure because why would he want to be married to such a horrible, horrible woman)?  He knew she was abusing him, right? I mean, I don't know how you miss a mark from a hot iron and God knows what other signs of abuse he had. Why in the hell is he leaving his son alone with this woman?? Also, why didn't he just take Kevin with him? If he's seeing a doctor about his son, then why isn't Kevin going with him so he can be diagnosed? Yes, I realize that if Kevin went with him, he would have died in the train crash and therefore there would have been no movie so it defeats the whole purpose, but, c'mon. Glass tells a seething Beast that if the crash hadn't happened, Kevin would never have been left alone with his mother and if she never continued to abuse him, then the Beast would never have been born. Before the Beast dropkicks Glass, he tells him that his main priority is to protect Kevin and he cannot trust him to keep him safe.

So more yada, yada, yada, to my surprise, all three of the main characters end up being killed by Dr. Staple and her group of armed men. It turns out all along she was part of a secret society who do believe that super heroes and villains exist, but don't want them being known to the public because "there just can't be gods amongst us". But, unfortunately for her, she is unable to keep it secret because she finds out that Glass had streamed the live security feed (it was alluded to several times that the entire hospital inside and out was covered in cameras so their whereabouts would be known at all times) to a private site and the videos showing the three of them doing extraordinary things like lifting a car over or bending steel or crawling across a wall are sent to his mother, David's son, and Casey. The three of them upload the videos that this society didn't want anybody to see and soon everyone in the world is able to see that super heroes and villains do and can exist.

So while I loved that all these movies tied together and he made a sequel to Unbreakable so many years after its release, I felt Glass was a bit of a disappointment. I guess it just didn't live up to my expectations. I was expecting David and Elijah to have more screen time together since they have so much history from the first movie. This is more like a psychological thriller than an actual comic book movie which fine with me because I wasn't expecting a Marvel movie or anything. I think my favorite part of the movie is when the credits rolled and there is a list of 24 names next to James McAvoy's name. I laughed when I saw that.